Hang On To The Good Days
by Rincewind2.0
Summary: Kensei and Shuuhei got their happy ending, but of course it didn't end there. How does a relationship work when you're living in different worlds? Easier said than done it seems. Short sequel to "Love On The Rocks".
1. Chapter 1

**Procrastination, my old enemy, strikes yet again! Well I have gotten some work actually done so this is my reward for that. Here's a peek into the lives of Kensei and Shuuhei after _Love On The Rocks, _I wanted to visit my favourite pairing once more. The first part is more concentrated on them separately but I hope you don't mind it too bad. I don't know if you could call this angsty, guess you could, I don't seem to be able to let them just live a happy life together, what a twat I am. I myself have been in a long-distance relationship (and there the similarities end) so I have a fair idea of the difficulties one faces in such a relationship even though everything is supposedly fine and dandy. Not that living in a "normal" relationship is without problems but in this case there is just so much outside factors at work that things get bit hairy. Oh no, maybe I've spoiled it bit too much now. **

**Oh yeah, also I think this is placed somewhere between the 17 month timeskip so in my version Kensei and the others don't immediately resume their old positions in Seireitei. It could almost be canon O.o (oh how I wish it would) I'm trying to make this into a one-shot but it already seems it will spin out of control (as it so very often happens) so I have no idea what will come of this. Enjoy it anyway, my gift to you. And sorry for everyone who's waiting for updates on my other stories, hope you don't mind!**

* * *

**Part 1.**

Shinji covered his face with his arm as the huge wave of reiatsu washed over him. He heard Love whistle lowly beside him and smirked, sometimes even the Visoreds themselves forgot how powerful they could be once unleashed. He lowered his arm to see Rose's crouched form on the ground fifty feet away, his Zanpakutou still in its released state. His Hollow mask had disintegrated and there was a large cut on his forehead. The reason for that was standing further away, idly spinning his small Zanpakutou on his finger. Kensei raised his hand to his face to remove his Hollow mask, revealing his grim smirk.

"Hell's bells Kensei" Rose almost tut-tutted as he straightened himself up, dusting off his velvety jacket, "watch the clothes, they don't come cheap." The burly man scoffed and grabbed his Zanpakutou back into his hand, crouching down to a stance.

"Again?" Rose sighed but whipped his weapon back, his hand ready to draw on his mask. Shinji chuckled as he leaned back on the rock behind him, idly crossing his hands behind his head. On the top of the rock he could hear Hiyori snorting derisively and instinctively prepared for getting smacked across the head with a sandal. The strike luckily never came as the former vice-captain merely slipped down to the ground and sat cross-legged next to Shinji, her arms folded tightly across her chest. She was glaring intently at the two fighting men from under her knitted brows, Shinji could sense the slight anxiousness in her reiatsu.

"What's troubling you, pussycat" he sneered, earning a harsh glare from the small woman.

"Fuck off Shinji" she spat out, turning her attention back to the fighters.

"Someone's on the rag" Love noted from the other side. He had barely uttered the last word as he was slammed to the ground, Hiyori promptly hitting him across his face in rapid succession. Shinji rolled his eyes and shook his head, _he had it coming, the idiot. _Shinji turned his attention back to the two fighters, Kensei was pressing Rose so hard the man had difficulties keeping control. Shinji could see that if the blonde man wanted to stay relatively unscathed he would have to step it up a notch or two, Kensei had some ulterior motive driving him on today.

The bigger man jumped up and delivered a spinning kick towards Rose's head. The blonde man ducked down, flicking his Kinshara back and then sent it flying towards Kensei, the whip-like weapon wrapping around Kensei's leg. Kensei was pulled down to the ground and Rose drew his weapon back, dragging Kensei along with it. The air filled with dust clouds as Kensei's body dragged along the ground before he managed to kick off Kinshara and bounce back to his feet. He immediately slashed down with his Tachikaze, sending its airblades swinging through the air. The blades cut through nearby stones and rocks, making the earth shake as they tumbled down. Rose used his shunpo to dodge the airblades and appeared behind Kensei, whipping his Zanpakutou at the man. Kensei turned around and raised his arm in front of him, letting the whip wrap around it and grabbing it into his fist. Rose's eyes widened behind his mask as Kensei pulled on his weapon, making him tumble towards the man and his Tachikaze. Before Rose gained his balance he could feel the cold steel of the Zanpakutou press against his stomach, just enough to break his skin.

"Okay, you win" the blonde man sighed and raised his free hand in the air, "please let me go now." Kensei smiled darkly behind his mask but released the man from his grasp, their masks disappearing as he did so.

Shinji clapped his hands, by his side Hiyori had finally stopped assaulting Love. The man lay in the ground immobile, apparently trying to avoid further assaults.

"Looked good guys" Shinji shouted at the two fighters as Rose dusted his jacket and inspected the small hole Kensei had made to his shirt, shaking his head at it. Kensei seemed unfazed, again spinning his Zanpakutou in his hand. He fixed his eyes on Hiyori, the small woman was breathing heavily from beating up Love. Kensei nodded at the woman, who smirked back and drew her Zanpakutou, starting to stomp towards the man. Rose threw his hands in the air and wobbled to Shinji, sitting beside Love and gave the man a strange look.

"What happened to you?" The dark-skinned man just shushed, cracking his one eye open to see if Hiyori had gone far enough.

"Don't worry, she'll take the rest of it out on Kensei" Shinji consoled him, "they seem to be on the same wave length today." Love scoffed but didn't get up yet. Rose wiped sweat from his forehead, huffing out a breath.

"I can understand Hiyori but what's gone into Kensei? He's been on edge for the past week."

"Isn't it obvious?" The men turned to look at Lisa who was now standing on top of the rock Shinji was leaning onto.

"Um, no?" Love tried, earning a roll of eyes from the woman as she skipped down to the ground.

"It's Shuuhei, obviously" she stated, "what else would drive him up the wall like this?" The men thought about this for a second and then nodded in unison.

"Yeah you're right, I haven't seen him around for a while" Rose remembered, rubbing his chin deep in thought.

"I heard he's trying to talk Kensei into returning to his position as the captain" Shinji put in, trying to sound nonchalant. He had actually heard the news while he had been eavesdropping on the couple during Shuuhei's last visit in the Real World.

"Really? I wonder what Kensei is making him do for that…"

"You're disgusting Lisa" Love noted, fixing his sunglasses on his nose.

"Oh don't play coy with me, you were all thinking about it!"

"No we weren't" Love tried to argue but the contemplative looks on both Shinji's and Rose's face gave them away.

"What? I'm just naturally curious" Shinji shrugged and turned to look at the fight that had already begun. Kensei was currently holding his arms up in front of his face as Hiyori spun in the air, delivering swift kicks at the man. Kensei didn't even budge, he seemed to be merely waiting for the woman to tire and finally she did, jumping backwards and sliding few feet on the ground, glaring daggers at the man.

"Wanna get serious?" Kensei asked her, throwing Tachikaze idly in the air and catching it without looking. Hiyori scoffed and swung her sword above her head, holding her other hand in front of her face. Kensei nodded and drew on his Hollow mask just as Hiyori leaped through the air, swinging down with her cleaver-like Shikai. Shinji grimaced as he compared Hiyori's huge weapon to Kensei's much smaller Shikai, but the man blocked Hiyori's violent swing with relatively ease. The ground under his feet shattered and another wave of reiatsu swarmed over their audience. Rose coughed as the dust tickled his throat, Love had to wipe the sand from his sunglasses.

"Those two go way too well together" he noted to the others, who nodded but then stopped to think about it.

"Should we warn Shuuhei?" Rose pondered, earning another contemplative silence which was broken by Lisa's derisive laugh.

"She might be flat as a board but not even Kensei is that horny he'd bang Hiyori" she sneered but was careful to keep her voice down so the woman in question wouldn't hear, "he went almost a century without any, few weeks should be nothing."

"But what if now he's used to getting some fairly regularly and it has thrown him off?" Rose wondered.

"Nah, he'll be fine as long as he has someone he can pound all his frustrations into" Shinji said, "and no, not like that." Lisa smirked and swatted a stray hair from her eyes as she looked at the fighting pair who were exchanging blows at a deadly pace.

"They're really going at it" Love noted, "I'm starting to think I was right."

"Right about what?"

"That it's Hiyori's time of the month." Now Lisa promptly smacked Love on the back of his head, earning a loud cry from the man.

"The hell is it with these women" he muttered as he rubbed his head. Shinji gave him a knowing look and tapped the side of his nose.

"You know what they say about women who live together for longer periods of time." Love's brows furrowed as he tried to think up something. Rose looked quizzical as well.

"No, what do they say?" Shinji threw a quick glance and Lisa and then leaned closer to his male comrades, whispering something to them in a hushed tone. Lisa was too occupied watching Kensei release his energy blast at Hiyori to listen as Rose and Love stared at Shinji with huge eyes when he was finished. Love seemed deeply disturbed but Rose nodded slowly.

"Yes, that would explain a lot actually" he said, glancing at Lisa from the corner of his eye and quietly shuffled bit further away from the woman.

"Ouch, that looked like it hurt" Shinji noted as Kensei jumped back on top of a large rock, holding onto his left arm that was bleeding profusely.

"How did she do that?" Rose asked, shadowing his eyes with his hand.

"How she usually hits anything, she just presses on until he gives in for a second too long. Plus Kensei needs to be much closer to hit her, he has to take risks in order to get through. He can't use the air blades or energy blasts the whole time" Lisa stated, climbing back on top of the rock. Shinji exhaled as he leaned back against the same rock, snapping his hat from his head and started to throw it in the air, catching it with ease.

"Why's Shuuhei trying to talk Kensei back into Soul Society anyway?" Love asked, crossing his arms under his chin.

"He wants to spend more time with his boyfriend of course" Shinji offered, throwing his one leg over the other, "he seems the clingy type to me."

"If I had a guy like Kensei I'd sure be clinging onto him" noted Mashiro who had suddenly appeared by their side. She stared at Kensei and Hiyori still beating each other to the pulp, her hips cocked to the side and head slightly tilted.

"Oh please Mashiro, no one wants to hear your jealous moaning anymore" Lisa scoffed.

"What do you mean?" the woman demanded, throwing her head back and glaring at Lisa, who gave her a knowing look over the rim of her glasses.

"Ever since Kensei suddenly wasn't spending all his time looking after your slutty ass but actually got a life of his own plus a hot boyfriend, you've done nothing but complained how he ignores you and doesn't play with you anymore. You're such a kid." Mashiro sneered and folded her arms on her chest, her shoulders jumping to her ears.

"I'm so not" she denied, her eyes darting to Kensei as the man did somersaults in the air to dodge Hiyori's brutal slam.

"But he _doesn't_ play with me anymore" she moaned after a short silence, earning a sigh from her friends.

"Just get over it Mashiro, go hunt yourself a man or something" Shinji dismissed her with a wave of his hand. The woman's brow twitched and she kicked the man on his shin, laughing loudly as he wailed out in pain.

"Jesus Christ woman, go beat up Hachi if you want to take your aggressions out on someone, he's too fat to feel it anyway!" the blonde snapped, earning a derisive sneer from Mashiro as she strutted out of the underground training area, her hips swinging as she walked. Rose noticed how Lisa's eyes followed the smaller woman as she walked up the stairs. The man nudged Love on his side and raised his brows at him, his eyes darting between the two women. Love stared back at his partner for some time before realization dawned on his face and he opened his mouth, only to snap it quickly shut. Any further conversation was prevented by Hiyori's small form suddenly flying through the air towards them, making all four quickly duck for cover as the woman hit the very rock Shinji had been leaning into. Hiyori growled as she pushed herself up from the debris, her Hollow mask was cracked so badly it almost shattered and her breathing was heavy. She had small cuts and bruises all over her body and her clothes were tattered.

She angrily stumbled forward, swinging her Zanpakutou with both hands as Kensei stood further away, blood was still trickling down his left arm but otherwise he seemed to be relatively fine. The man said nothing but merely raised his hand, curling his fingers towards his palm in an inviting and taunting gesture. Shinji poked his head up from his hiding to see Hiyori almost shake from rage as she lunged towards Kensei, the man's calm demeanor annoyed her to no end. The small woman unleashed a series of rapid attacks on Kensei, the man calmly dodging every one with ease. Suddenly he pushed down with Tachikaze, trapping Hiyori's Shikai under it. Hiyori didn't have time to dodge before a swift punch from Kensei's elbow sent her flying again, her Zanpakutou slipping from her hand. The small woman struggled to get back up, her arms shaking and breathe hitching as she tried to feel whether her ribs had cracked from the impact. Before Kensei made another move Shinji appeared by his side, ready to grab his sword arm.

"That's enough for one day big guy" he said, glancing at Hiyori's shaking form as she finally made it to her feet, her Hollow mask disintegrating completely. To Shinji's surprise Kensei didn't even argue, mainly whisked his hand to remove his own mask and tucked his Zanpakutou back into his boot. Rose had gone to help out Hiyori but the woman merely pushed him away, limping to Kensei. The man stared down at her as she grabbed her Zanpakutou that had reverted back into its unreleased state.

"You okay there, Hiyori?" Shinji asked, knowing it probably wasn't the best idea. But it seemed the beating she had received had drained her of her spite for a while since she barely scoffed before hopping towards the stairs and exited the training grounds. Shinji waited till she was gone and then turned to Kensei who seemed to be waiting for him to say something.

"So, what's eating you?" the blonde man asked, earning a silent scowl from his comrade.

"It's our little Shuu, isn't it?" Shinji continued, rewarding himself with a wide smile as he noticed the twitch on Kensei's brow once he used the nick name Kensei hated. Shinji wasn't sure if it was the fact he called the vice-captain 'ours', 'little' or that Kensei rarely used his name at all, mostly he talked about 'the kid' when he was with them.

"None of your business" Kensei said but was cut off by Shinji before he even ended the sentence.

"You make it my business when you start pummeling your friends like this. Granted, Hiyori can take it and she was asking for it but still." Shinji gave Kensei a more serious look that said 'we've been here before'.

"Sorry" Kensei muttered as if the word tasted foul on his tongue, his eyes avoiding Shinji.

"I just want to know if something's really wrong so we can lock you up if we need to" the blonde man noted almost smilingly, rocking back and forth on his heels. Kensei whipped his head to him and gave him an angry glare, but Shinji could see amusement glinting in his eyes.

"That worked so well the last time, didn't it?" the man said, now almost smiling. Shinji smirked back, his hand slowly moving to his Zanpakutou.

"Hey guys, dinner's ready!" Rose shouted at them, breaking the tension. Shinji whipped around and waved his hand to the man.

"We'll be right there, you go ahead!" he exclaimed and reached his hand to grab Kensei's arm to stop him from sneaking away. He glanced at the man over his shoulder, his hat shadowing his eyes.

"I'm not done with you yet." Kensei snatched his hand away but stayed put until their other friends had left the training grounds and moved upstairs.

"Talk" the former captain ordered, his hands folded on his chest as he waited for Shinji to speak his mind. The blonde man exhaled heavily, puffing out his cheeks as he tried to find the words. Kensei growled lowly, he knew perfectly well Shinji was just playing around with him, trying to make him control his temper better.

"Shinji" he snarled as a warning, making the other Visored snap out of his thoughts and flash him a quick smile.

"Sorry Kensei, got bit lost there for a second."

"How about you just talk and we can be done with this?" Kensei grumbled, shifting his weight from one foot to another.

"Alright, alright, sorry" the blond man said, "why don't we sit down first?" Kensei gave him a query look but complied, folding his legs into a cross-legged position on the ground. Shinji hopped closer to him, dropping down to sit on his hunches.

"So, how is our favourite vice-captain doing?" Kensei's brow twitched again and Shinji nodded to himself mentally, _he does not like sharing. _

"He's fine" the man grunted, shifting in his place and then added, "busy but fine."

"Oh yeah, we haven't seen him around lately" Shinji said as if he had just noticed it, "is that why he's trying to recruit you back?" Kensei's eyes narrowed as he stared at Shinji as if he was trying to see into his brain.

"How do you know that?" he said slowly, not even bothering to deny it. Shinji smirked and spread out his hands, falling back to sit cross-legged like Kensei.

"I just figured he'd want to have you there by his side, now that we've been proven to be harmless" the blonde replied, "he's running the whole squad on his own now, it must be one hell of a workload for someone so young."

"He does a perfectly good job" Kensei was quick to argue, making Shinji raise his hands up in a defensive gesture.

"I didn't say he didn't, I just thought it's stressful, even for someone with his talent and skill." Kensei seemed to calm down by Shinji's praising words so the man lowered his hand back to his lap.

"Why don't you go back?" The former captain snorted but Shinji could see there was hesitation in his eyes. He tilted his head to one side, he was genuinely curious now.

"You're the one who has never really settled here, not like the rest of us. Being captain was your life, this what we have here" Shinji gestured to the whole area around them, "cannot compare to that. So why not go back, if they're willing to take you?"

"I have my duties here now" Kensei said quickly, "I'm not going to abandon them just because…"

"Just because what? Because Shuuhei wants you to?" Shinji irked him, "As I recall, you were ready to lay waste to the Real World _and _the Soul Society if you didn't get him. So I'd imagine when he asks you something you could easily do, you wouldn't hesitate for a second." Shinji stopped to allow Kensei to answer, the man was seemingly torn.

"I can't just leave everything we have here, no matter how personally detached I'd feel from it" he finally uttered weighing his every word carefully, something he rarely did, "we've been together for over a century, even longer than that in Soul Society. If I go back…They won't treat me the same way no matter what we did for them, I'm still an abomination to most of them, we all are. This is my home now." Kensei's voice faded as he said the last words and Shinji couldn't help but to think he wasn't happy about it.

"Don't sound too excited, man" he scoffed but then as Kensei didn't even try to punch him he settled down, now almost feeling sorry for him.

"Why do you care then, you didn't care what people thought about your relationship before, why start now?"

"You don't get it, it's different" Kensei mumbled, obviously not wanting to talk about it but Shinji pressed on.

"I don't see the difference, you haven't cared about people's opinions before anyway, plus they'd stop it eventually once they saw you weren't bothered. Stop making excuses Kensei."

"I don't care what they say about me, I care…I don't want Shuuhei to have any more problems as it is" the man finally spat out, glaring at Shinji from the corner of his eye as if daring him to taunt him for his softness towards the young man. But Shinji knew better than that, Hiyori he could poke all day and survive even her most vicious attacks but with Kensei one word too far would mean at the least a broken leg, and even for Shinji that was way too painful a price to pay. His eyes were almost instinctively drawn to Kensei's bulging biceps and he suppressed the urge to move away from him to create safe distance.

"Alright, so you don't want everyone to start discriminating Shuuhei because of you" Shinji recapped just to make sure he was on the right track, "but I thought he was everyone favourite, doesn't everyone practically bend over backwards to help him out?" _Speaking of bending over_, Shinji cackled in his head but managed to keep the quip to himself.

"Yeah they do but not everyone knows about us, and they don't have to" the man said sternly.

"But doesn't the fact that you visit him kinda give the game out?"

"We've been careful" Kensei explained, a fact that also seemed to bug him, "plus we have some friends who help out."

"Oh right, like Renji" Shinji said, remembering his conversation with the red-haired vice-captain when they had visited the Soul Society after Shuuhei's hearing, "he seemed ready to help Shuuhei out." Kensei wringed his hands in his lap and Shinji arched an eyebrow. _Oh, another sore spot? Man, this guy's messed up._

"Or is that a problem as well?" Kensei was clearly struggling to say no and as he finally did, the word dropped from his lips like something that tasted rotten in his mouth. Shinji sighed and pressed his hands against the ground.

"Okay, I see this is even more complicated than I thought" he said as he got up, earning a questioning look from Kensei, "and I'm not doing any counseling on an empty stomach."

"I didn't ask you to" Kensei grunted but got up to his feet as well.

"I know, I'm just offering, as your friend" the blonde smiled, "we'll meet in my room after dinner."

"What if I don't wanna talk about it?" Kensei asked, though he already knew the answer and his suspicions were only confirmed as Shinji flashed him that creepy grin of his that didn't reach his eyes.

"I think you'd prefer talking about it if you knew what the option was." Kensei knew better than to ask for clarification, he knew what Shinji was into and didn't want any part of it.

"Fine, deal" he agreed as he stomped past the man towards the stairs leading back to their headquarters, "but I'm not gonna like it."

"Who says I will?" Shinji quipped as he followed few steps behind, his eyes fixed on the tense line of Kensei's shoulders.

* * *

"Hisagi-san?" The tired- looking young man raised his eyes from the report he was holding in his hand and stared blankly at the young Shinigami in front of him.

"Yes, sorry" he mumbled, trying to focus his eyes, "you were saying?" The young Shinigami looked worried and shifted awkwardly in his place.

"I was just asking if you were alright" he finally said, "you have been reading that same page for the last fifteen minutes." Shuuhei batted his eyes and looked back at the report, realizing the young man was only half-right. He hadn't been even reading the report, he had been merely staring at it seeing nothing.

"Oh, don't worry I was just thinking about something else" he quickly dismissed, "I'm perfectly fine, thank you for asking." The Shinigami didn't seem convinced but didn't want to argue with the squad's vice-captain, no matter how unstable he might be. With a quick bow he returned to his post, leaving Shuuhei with his ever-growing workload. The young vice-captain sighed and let the report slip through his fingers, rubbing his temples. He hadn't slept for so long he had already lost count, after dealing with the aftermath of the Winter War he had thought the workload would ease slowly but he had thought wrong. Trying to balance all his work had become increasingly difficult now when he had to spare time for Kensei too, the one thing he would've wanted to do.

Shuuhei felt a smile automatically tug his lips as he thought of his lover, but the smile was bittersweet. He hadn't seen the man in almost a month now and the longing just grew daily, it was turning into a physical sensation that made his chest tighten. It was only made worse as he thought about their last meeting, it hadn't ended the way he would've wanted. He had tried to once more talk Kensei into coming back to Soul Society and regain his place as the captain of the ninth squad but it had only resulted into an ugly fight. Shuuhei cringed at the memory, Kensei had accused him of being childish and naïve and Shuuhei had told the man he was being selfish and a coward. Both knew they were lying and that made it hurt even more. Shuuhei had been so close to saying he wished to have never met Kensei but had been able to bite his tongue in time, he knew that even in his deepest anger he should never such things. This relationship had risked so much for both of them and despite everything it was worth all that and more. Shuuhei had never felt more alive and happy when he was with Kensei but with that came everything that wasn't so good in a relationship. It was when the bad times overcame the good ones one should consider was it all worth it.

Shuuhei heard commotion from the office and snapped out of his thoughts. He heard a familiar gruff voice arguing with one of his subordinates and then heavy footsteps stomping towards his door. The door was almost slammed aside and the unmistakable form of Renji Abarai stood in the doorway, his long hair framing his face and shoulders like a blood red halo as the light shone from behind him.

"I'm sorry sir I tried to stop him" Shuuhei's subordinate wheezed as he came to the door, apparently he had tried to keep up with the fierce vice-captain of the sixth squad.

"Yeah yeah, didn't do a very good job there buddy" Renji barked, throwing a glare at the young man over his shoulder, "maybe you should concentrate more on training than paperwork." Shuuhei could see how the young Shinigami's lower lip started to quiver and got up from his chair with a deep sigh.

"It's okay, Abarai- san is apparently too busy for manners" he said as he walked to the young Shinigami, "just give us a minute, alright?"

"Ye-yes, Hisagi- san" the young man nodded and almost ran away as Shuuhei closed the door behind Renji. The redhead had already walked to his desk, grabbed a report into his hand and was now scanning through it quickly, his keen brown eyes darting across the page. When he was finished he slammed the report back on Shuuhei's table with a loud scoff and turned to face the vice-captain. He frowned as he noticed the dark circles under Shuuhei's eyes and his slouching posture.

"That's not under your jurisdiction" he noted, pointing at the report he had just read, "you need to delegate that to someone else." Shuuhei let out a tired laugh and shrugged his shoulders.

"Like who? I'm the highest authority in this place, it's not like I can give that to the Captain Commander and expect him to help me out" he said as he walked to his desk, idly straightening the papers back in order. He could feel Renji's eyes following his every move, the man's reiatsu had an edge to it that crawled under his skin and made his head ache.

"What do you want Renji?" he sighed as he leaned his hand to his desk, turning his good eye to the redhead. Renji was looking positively furious, his reiatsu was making the air feel heavy.

"I've been hearing some disconcerting things about you Shuuhei" the man said quietly, his tone sounded almost threatening and Shuuhei's brow knitted together, he was too tired to deal with this.

"My business is my own" he snapped back, noting he sounded more defensive than he ought to. Renji's reiatsu was wrapping around him and it felt suffocating.

"Renji, stop it" he said in a quiet but dangerous voice he usually only used when he was fighting someone.

"Renji" he repeated, his hand clenching into a tight fist and he noticed he was almost shaking, the furniture in the room was starting to wobble from the amount of reiatsu, "I said, stop it."

"Make me" the redhead answered in an equally low voice. Shuuhei turned his eyes back to Renji, and the redhead almost grinned at his dead-serious expression. He noticed how Shuuhei's hand was moving to his Zanpakutou and now his face split into a wolfish smile.

"Let's take this outside" Shuuhei ordered and before Renji had time to reply the young man had shunpo'd out of his office, the redhead quickly following suit. Shuuhei didn't stop until they were outside of Rukongai, deep in the woods. He stopped near the edge of the forest into a clearing and waited for Renji to catch up. When the red-haired vice-captain landed on the clearing Shuuhei was standing with his back to him, his reiatsu slowly stirring under his control. Renji swung his Zanpakutou on his shoulder, tilting his head to one side in a cocky gesture.

"Why Renji?" Shuuhei asked him, his voice straining, "Why do you pester me like this?"

"Someone needs to" the redhead replied, pointing his sword towards the vice-captain, "you're in desperate need of having some sense beaten into that thick skull of yours." Shuuhei laughed mirthlessly and turned to Renji, his eyes flaring with inner fire.

"And you think that an ape like you is the one to do it?" he spat out, only making Renji's grin widen.

"That was the plan" he replied, moving his one foot behind him and leaning his weight on it, waiting for Shuuhei to make the first move, "show me your worst."

Shuuhei wasn't smiling, he found nothing funny about fighting and suddenly Renji thought maybe he had gone too far this time. He didn't have any more time to regret though as Shuuhei's Kazeshini came slicing down towards him and he raised Zabimaru to block it, the impact made his knees wobble. He pushed Shuuhei back, the young man jumped to the ground and flicked his sword in his hand, his reiatsu still quietly under his control. Renji never bothered with restraint, his own red-coloured spirit power was flaring wildly around him, making the little rocks on his feet rise up from the ground. He could see Shuuhei was glaring at him with distain, he had never been one for showing off. That was probably one of the reasons people weren't asking him to be a captain, they thought he wasn't strong enough. _Oh how stupid people can be, _Renji chuckled mentally as he eyed the serious young man in front of him. He knew if he went too far he would get his ass handed to him in a second, he wouldn't even have time to summon his Bankai if Shuuhei wanted to stop this. But for now he just enjoyed irking the young man, trying to make him show some other emotion than that goddamn annoying misery that still shadowed his eyes. It made Renji's blood nearly boil and he had wanted to beat that misery out of Shuuhei for months now, and this was finally his chance.

"That the best you got?" he asked, spinning Zabimaru idly in his hand and spat on the ground, "pathetic." Shuuhei's eyes narrowed as he traced the movements of Renji's Zanpakutou, his always analytic mind thinking of the best possible strategy to shut the vice-captain's big mouth for good. In his head Kazeshini was taunting him to call it out, but Shuuhei didn't want to rely on sheer power to win this fight. That wasn't his way, it was too easy and once you stepped on that particular path…Everyone knew how it would end. Renji grew tired of waiting, snorting at Shuuhei who was quietly observing him. He launched into a run and slashed the air with Zabimaru, the sword's spirit was howling inside his mind from the joy of the battle. It could sense they were fighting a worthy opponent and was waiting for things to get hairy.

Renji was always at his best in fights where he was the underdog, and despite Shuuhei was now fighting only half- heartedly, Renji could feel it in his every block and strike and see it in his eyes, both him and Zabimaru knew the odds could change any minute. If he just could annoy Shuuhei to the point where he'd have to start take this seriously. Renji grunted as he aimed a violent blow at Shuuhei's abdomen, the vice-captain blocked the swing and kicked Renji back, making his feet drag on the ground. Renji could sense the spike in his reiatsu, he was finally getting pissed off. _Good,_ he thought as he lunged into another series of quick swings and almost blindingly fast blows, driving Shuuhei slowly to the corner. He started to finally feel something else than sadness and apathy in the young man's counterattacks and it made his smile widen, which in return seemed to annoy Shuuhei even more. Renji aimed a spinning kick at Shuuhei's head, the vice-captain grabbed hold of his ankle and stopped him midair, his serious eyes fixed on Renji's.

"What are you trying Renji?" he demanded, throwing the man to the ground. Renji rolled to his feet, a low chuckle resonating in his chest as he flexed his shoulders back.

"I dunno what you're talking about" he replied, shifting his footing as he prepared for another attack, "does it matter since you won't listen to anyone anyway." Shuuhei frowned at him, his focus shifting for a second too long. He almost didn't manage to dodge Renji's wild strike that would've cost him an arm if he hadn't jumped back, Renji's sword carving a deep scar on the ground where he had just stood.

"What do you mean?" he asked as Renji fixed his grip on Zabimaru's hilt. The redhead smirked and pointed his sword at him, his keen eyes blazing with inner fire and his reiatsu flaring even more out of control than before.

"I'm saying what everyone has been thinking for the past few months, Shuuhei" he said, "you just won't listen."

"And this is how you're going to make me?" Shuuhei asked, anger creeping into his usually calm voice, "By mindless and pointless fighting?" Shuuhei glared at the redhead quietly for a second.

"Though I should've known it's the only way you know." In another situation Renji would've taken the remark more personally but now wasn't the time for it. He was just glad he was getting somewhere.

"It also seems to be the only way you'll listen" he countered, crouching down into a defensive stance, "for such a smart guy you can be really stupid sometimes Shuuhei. And that's coming from me." Shuuhei didn't smile, his lips didn't even slightly curl upwards at the remark. His reiatsu was finally starting to show as a gleaming aura around his body, but it was still only stirring, not wildly lashing out as Renji's was.

"This is pointless" Shuuhei repeated, his sword pointing towards the ground and for a second Renji thought he'd just run away. But then Shuuhei met his eyes and Renji wasn't sure whether to smile at his victory or curse his own stupidity.

"And I will end this" the vice-captain said just before Renji's Zanpakutou came swinging through the air. Shuuhei didn't even move as he blocked the attack with one hand, the other one reaching to grab the front of Renji's uniform and threw him to the ground again. Renji coughed as his breath hitched but didn't have time to rest as he heard Shuuhei's voice casting a Kido chant.

"Fuck" he hissed between his teeth and quickly scrambled to his feet, he knew he could never counter Shuuhei's Kido spells. Glowing rods of pure energy materialized in Shuuhei's hands and Renji cursed his stupidity for forgetting this very important detail about Shuuhei's fighting tactics. He shunpo'd out of the way just in time as the rods pierced the ground and air, moving behind the young man's back. Renji slashed at the vice-captain only to have Zabimaru almost knocked from his hand by a sudden kick to his shoulder. Renji grunted as his fingers instinctively grasped tighter onto Zabimaru and then smirked as he figured out his next move. Shuuhei frowned at his expression but then everything turned black as Renji's fist connected with his face with a gruesome crunching sound. Shuuhei tottered backwards, his free hand automatically pressing on his face, trying to see if his nose had been broken. Renji shook his hand and hissed from the pain in his knuckles. Shuuhei was still disoriented as he felt Zabimaru's cold blade press against his throat. He was more than ready to stop anyway so he just raised his hands in the air despite Kazeshini's furious growling in his head, calling him a coward and a shame.

"So what now?" he asked the redhead who was still holding the blade to his throat.

"Now" Renji replied, finally drawing his sword back and strapping it to his belt, "we talk."

"So there was a point to all this?" Shuuhei muttered as his muscles slowly relaxed as the adrenaline settled down. Renji was already walking back to the treeline to sit in the shadow of the trees and he glanced back at Shuuhei over his shoulder.

"Besides finally getting to kick your ass, yeah" the redhead smirked. Then Shuuhei suddenly smiled at him, and he looked so beautiful Renji felt like kissing him, his face bloodied and sweaty and his clothes rumbled and dirty but his eyes were finally shining like they used to. The vice-captain followed Renji into the treeline where they settled down under an old oak tree, Renji leaning his back comfortably against the tree's trunk as Shuuhei settled next to him in a cross-legged position. Just now he noticed how beautiful a day it actually was, only a slight breeze was gently blowing through the woods and birds were singing somewhere in the distance. The sun was starting to set, its warmth still lingering in the air. Renji sighed beside him, sounding content. Shuuhei turned his eyes to him, and smiled at how relaxed he looked, how happy and self-assured. He remembered that look from their Academy days and the memories made his insides feel warm.

"I'm sorry Renji" he said quietly, making the redhead crack his eyes open and stare at him. For a minute he said nothing but then scoffed and reached his hand to punch him on the shoulder.

"Idiot" he muttered, crossing his hands on his chest and raising his head up to soak in the last rays of sunlight. Shuuhei's smile was toned down by his slight frown.

"I thought we were going to talk" he said but was cut off as Renji raised his finger to his lips and shushed.

"We will, just be quiet for a while. I'm tired." Shuuhei rolled his eyes but settled his back against the tree, listening to the nature around them. He suddenly realized he couldn't remember the last time he had just sat down with his friends and just been, without the need of actually doing anything or saying anything. He could feel his stress slightly winding down, the tenseness in his shoulders and neck loosening and the dull ache that had been hammering behind his eyes for weeks was suddenly gone. He inhaled heavily and then breathed out slowly, even the tight feeling in his chest eased a little.

"Feeling better?" Renji asked him and Shuuhei snapped his eyes open, he wasn't sure how long they had sat there. Renji was staring at him from the corner of his eye, Shuuhei noticed how his red hair had gotten noticeably longer. It now cascaded softly down instead of sticking upwards making him look like pineapple. He had also felt the change in Renji's strength during their fight, he had been training hard.

"Yeah" Shuuhei replied, again feeling how easily the smile crept to his face after such a long time, "I actually do." He could see the flicker in Renji's eyes, that familiar look he had known since the beginning of their friendship. He had seen it in his eyes when he had aced an exam, when he had won a battle, when they had been lying on a bed next in each other's arms. He realized he missed that look, he had been too busy with work and everything to actually notice anything happening outside his office. Those few times he had stolen away he had spent with Kensei though he had promised he would spend more time with his friends. He remembered the talk he'd had with Renji back then, the one that had reminded him of the times when things were simple and normal, of those lazy long afternoons when they could've just laid in bed and recover from their collective hangovers, talk trash and laugh until the sun went down and they would've gone out to meet their friends for another night out. That had been before they both became vice-captains, before Ichigo Kurosaki stormed in the Soul Society and started the chain of events that had changed their lives forever.

"Do you miss it?" Shuuhei asked, knowing Renji knew exactly what he meant.

"You kidding me?" the redhead scoffed, "Of course I do. But also, I don't." Shuuhei raised his eyebrows but wasn't really surprised, Renji hadn't really lost anything like he had. He still had his captain, their relationship had actually improved. He had made new friends, fought and triumphed many battles and defended the Soul Society from Aizen. Renji had always wanted recognition and glory, Shuuhei would've been content on serving as an unseated officer and just doing his duty, he had gotten so much more than he bargained for. But he did it all, because people wanted him to. He had to, he had never even thought about having a choice in the matter.

"Is it really worth it?" he whispered, not really to anyone, "What if it's all just…"

"Don't talk like that" Renji cut him off, grabbing Shuuhei's arm firmly, "you can't change it, nobody can. That road leads nowhere."

"I know" Shuuhei said and leaned his head against the tree, "but I can't help it." Renji's touch felt comforting.

"I know."


	2. Chapter 2

**So my one-shot turned out to be a one-shot in three parts. The last chapter will be uploaded in few days, but I'm gonna post these two first just to keep you on your toes...Plus I really wanted to upload something, it's been way too quiet for me for the past month or so. Hope you enjoy it!**

* * *

**Part 2.**

Kensei felt like an idiot. He was lying on Shinji's couch as the blonde tried to get him talking, asking stupid questions that only annoyed him to no end. He had already punched a hole in his wall during another similar session when Shinji had demanded he talk about his "issues". Kensei glanced at the shoddily fixed hole in the wall and grudgingly admitted that maybe he did have a problem. But it was his problem and would stay that way if only this goddamn idiot would shut his mouth.

"So that's what I think is troubling you" Shinji concluded, waking Kensei from his thoughts as he sensed soon it would be time to react to something, "what do you think?" Kensei's eyes moved slowly to Shinji, the smaller man was sitting on his bed and smiling at him with those crazy teeth of his. Kensei had dreams of punching them out. _One day…_

"Sorry, didn't catch any of that" he said dryly, enjoying seeing the smile drain from Shinji's features, "care to repeat that?" Shinji pouted his lips at him in a defiant gesture.

"You're doing this on purpose Kensei, I'm just trying to help."

"Well, you're not" the man replied and shifted on the couch. Shinji sighed and rubbed his face, sticking his tongue out at Kensei.

"You know this is for your own good" he tried to reason.

"No, it's for you to play shrink with me and try to pry into my personal life, that's all there is to it" Kensei replied, throwing a long look at Shinji who was trying to look as if he had no idea what the man was talking about.

"Well okay, but that was that one time only" he finally gave in, "but something's really troubling you this time, and I'd like to know before you start going crazy." Shinji stared Kensei in the eyes, trying to win him in this silent battle of minds but Kensei had mastered the art of staring someone down decades ago and Shinji had to admit his defeat. He was already thinking of another way to force Kensei into talking when the man sighed and pushed himself up on the couch.

"Fine, if it'll get you off my back, I'll talk." Shinji's face lit up with a wide smile and he leaned forward with an anxious look in his eyes that made Kensei already regret his decision.

"Right, so, you mentioned that Shuuhei wants you to go back but you don't really want to because of many reasons I'm too busy to remember right now." Kensei gave him a sardonic look but stayed quiet which Shinji took as a good sign.

"But if we said you could go and we wouldn't mind, would you do it?"

"So you want to get rid of me?"

"Well if the option is having you raging around the place like Hiyori during the time of month then frankly yes, having three crazy bitch queens is quite enough for me." Kensei's brow twitched dangerously but Shinji could see he was taking in his meaning.

"Actually, I wouldn't mind going back myself" Shinji noted, leaning his back against the wall behind him, "I remembered how fun it could be in that party Kyoraku threw the last I was there." Kensei arched an eyebrow at him, Shinji had never before mentioned any interest of going back to Soul Society. He had actually adapted into the Real World quite well, maybe better than anyone else of their small group.

"I said it wasn't just that" Kensei reminded him, trying to remember why he was actually here in the first place, "I don't want to cause him any more trouble than I already am." Shinji scoffed and dismissed the worry with a wave of his hand.

"Pfft, who cares what the others think? I'd say we have earned their respect and more." Kensei had to admit Shinji was right there, he wasn't actually that sure what the regular Shinigami thought of them, they had seemed more curious than anything else during his past visits. That and the fact that all the old captains seemed to be on their side, Kyoraku and Ukitake had actually helped to make this all even possible. Kensei felt indebted to them though he'd never admit it to their faces. _Maybe it would actually work…_Then Kensei remembered the last time he had seen Shuuhei and how well that had ended. He could hear Shuuhei's words ringing in his ears and felt his insides twist. Of course he knew everything wouldn't be perfect forever but this argument was just so stupid it made him angry just be thinking about it now. Shinji raised his eyebrows as he noticed the fluctuation in Kensei's reiatsu.

"So if we can now discard your worry about us, the others, what's left? Do you want to go back being a captain?" Kensei's thoughts drifted away from the fight and he frowned as he thought of the idea. He had been so adamant of not going back that he hadn't even thought what it would be like to resume his position as captain. Though it was more than a century ago when he had last worn captain's haori he could easily remember how he had enjoyed it, the responsibilities, the perks of the job, he had been good at his job. He had been respected and admired, he had gotten along with his subordinates, if you don't count in Mashiro's antics. Of course there was the paperwork but he had been able to delegate most of it to someone more competent and relieve himself from most of the real work.

A slow smile crept to his face as the memories flooded his mind, those had been good days. Shinji noticed his relaxed expression and chuckled to himself, it was rare to see Kensei smiling outside the battlefield these days.

"I take it you wouldn't really mind going back" he said, "if the option is staying here with this lot." Kensei hemmed, it would be a change to go back to his old squad and be able to resume his former life. He wouldn't have to hide anymore, he wouldn't have to pretend being a normal person and most important to him personally, he could give up using this fucking annoying gigai the whole time. Urahara did a great job with their special designed faux bodies but it was still making a soul live in a fake corpse for most of the time.

"Yeah, I wouldn't" Kensei finally replied, glancing at Shinji with a crooked smile on his face, "you probably wouldn't either." Now it was Shinji's turn to take a walk down memory lane. He didn't mind the Real World that much to be frank, but he had to admit being a captain had been slightly more luxurious than living in an abandoned warehouse with a bunch of weirdoes. Especially now when Hiyori had been more on edge than usual and was doing his head in on a very personal level.

"Those were the days, eh?" he grinned, folding his arms behind his head, "To be able to boss everyone around, sign few reports every now and then, drink sake in the afternoon and still get paid for it…That's the life." Kensei didn't say anything, he was now thinking how it would be to have Shuuhei as his vice-captain. He knew the young man was dutiful, did his work more than perfectly and was admired and respected by his subordinates. Plus he never took the honour for anything and never said no to anyone if they asked for his help. _So almost the complete opposite of Mashiro, _Kensei scoffed mentally. That woman had probably been the worst part of being a captain, of course she was capable and did her work but their personalities clashed so badly it had been almost impossible to go through one day without wanting to strangle her. And she had some tendencies that only caused Kensei stress and possible stomach ulcers.

"Man, maybe Shuuhei could talk me my job back as well" Shinji pondered, tapping his chin with his fingers. Kensei snorted but the idea wasn't that far-fetched. The fifth squad was also lacking a captain and Shinji, despite his obvious dislike for all the formal duties belonging to the job, had been respected and accomplished as a captain in his time. Kensei would never say it to his face but he was much more intelligent and stronger than he made himself out to be. The jester's role was all an act, but it worked. Shinji had never been the serious type but he came round when the situation needed him to. Though Kensei usually found his lack of focus annoying he had to admit sometimes he did bring a refreshing point of view into things. Plus it would've been miserable if everyone was stoic and serious all the time.

"Hey, I haven't said yes to anything yet" Kensei said, "besides, I don't even know whether the squad would take me back. Not to mention Yamamoto himself."

"Pfft, that old fart would be just happy to have someone in charge he can actually remember. He doesn't have that many allies he could just ignore a potential new one. Or two." Kensei smirked at Shinji's clear interest of becoming a captain again. But if they both left, then it would be a whole different matter for the others.

"We need to talk about this with the others if we should both leave and return to Soul Society" he noted to Shinji, trying to calm down his excitement, "one of us leaving is a big deal in itself but two…That might be too hard to handle, so don't get carried away."

"Okay okay, I won't" Shinji promised but Kensei knew the second he'd leave him he would run to Urahara and start prodding the man for information about Soul Society and the possibility of his return as a captain. _Strange, if I had never met Shuuhei, if someone else had come here to inspect us, would we ever even had considered this? Funny thought. _

"Oh wait" Shinji suddenly said, tearing his mind away from his daydreams, "there was still something bugging you. When I mentioned that redhead friend of Shuuhei's." Kensei bit down his jaw, he had hoped the blonde would've forgotten about that already.

"What about him?" Shinji smirked at him victoriously as he noticed the strain in Kensei's voice.

"You tell me, big man. Are you jealous?" Kensei wanted to say no immediately but knew it would seem too desperate. Plus he didn't even want to admit to himself that he had any doubts on Shuuhei's faithfulness to him, and he had said he wouldn't get jealous of his friends. _But he's not just a friend, is he? _he caught himself thinking and wanted to kick himself for it. Renji was Shuuhei's oldest friend and there was nothing between them anymore besides friendship. A deep friendship but still, nothing more. Certainly nothing he should be concerned about.

"I…I'm not sure" he finally answered, earning a questioning look from Shinji, "they…he…I don't know what to think. Shuuhei would never…" Kensei's voice trailed off as he wasn't sure himself what he was thinking.

"Well Renji seemed to be awfully protective of him" the blonde man noted, remembering the redhead's words from earlier, "he made some gruesome promises of what he would do to you if you should ever hurt his friend." Kensei scoffed, the idea of a mere vice-captain standing up to him seemed ridiculous.

"But I'm sure he wouldn't be the only one" Shinji added, "Shuuhei has many friends and allies in Soul Society and I wager many of them would want to have your head if you hurt him."

"I would never hurt him" Kensei argued, "I…I couldn't." Shinji frowned slightly as he noticed how Kensei's whole demeanor changed when he talked about the young man. Usually he became more relaxed and almost laidback but now he was strung so tight Shinji could almost hear him grating his teeth together, his fists clenching and legs shuffling nervously.

"Kensei, you alright there? You seem bit…tense."

"I just don't want to fuck it all up" the man sighed, his posture slouching a bit, "'cause if I do, I've…I don't wanna think about it."

"Oh c'mon, you've had bit of a rough time, it's not the end of the world" Shinji tried to say, "hey, if you now you go to Soul Society, talk it over with him and then stay there, he'll have more time for you, you'll see each other every day and all's well. How about that?"

"But what if it doesn't work? Maybe we've got this far because we don't see each other all the time, what if once we spend more time together we realize it doesn't work and then I'm stuck there? I can't leave after that." Shinji exhaled heavily and pressed his hands together, counseling a grown man was proofing to be more difficult than he had thought.

"Right, listen Kensei, if you were serious about actually killing people to get to be with Shuuhei, I don't think some domestication will ruin that. You're just scared because you've never done this before and you love him so much you can't even say it, am I right?" Kensei stared at Shinji quietly, slightly surprised by his frighteningly accurate intuition. He nodded slowly, he was in a way glad Shinji was doing the talking since he would never admit those things to him out loud.

"Great, so, now you just have to man up, go talk to him no matter how busy he might be and say you want to go back as a captain and maybe hint that I might be willing to do so too." Kensei gave him an incredulous expression as the man uttered the last words.

"An ulterior motive, what a surprise." Shinji flashed him an apologetic smile and spread out his hands.

"You know me, I need some reward for helping you out." Kensei stared at him for few seconds and then cracked that one-sided smile at him, making Shinji know he was on safe ground.

"I'll think about it" he said as he pushed himself up from the couch, "I gotta go."

"To see Urahara?" Shinji asked, scrambling on his bed after the man, "Can I come too?" Kensei turned to look at him with an expression of mixed amusement and disbelief.

"Since when have you asked me for permission?"

"Since I'm practically crashing on your date." Seeing Kensei's expression darken again Shinji quickly corrected his statement.

"Meaning I'm just gonna say hi and then be on my way" he said, "I just wanna make sure you don't forget me." Kensei scoffed as he opened the door.

"Don't worry, I've tried. Didn't work." Shinji wasn't sure whether to take that as a twisted compliment or a pure insult, Kensei was sometimes a hard man to read. He settled for the first option, if for nothing else than to keep up his appearances.

They descended the steel stairs back into the hall where Rose and Love were lounging, the blonde man was practicing his guitar playing and his partner was reading some manga he had no doubt borrowed from Lisa.

"Where are you two going?" Love asked, peering at them over the rim of his sunglasses.

"To visit Urahara" Shinji said, skipping to the main door and sliding it open.

"Both of you?" Rose asked curiously, striking out a low tune from his guitar. Kensei said nothing as he walked to the door, he was already thinking what he would say to Shuuhei once he saw him.

"Yeah, we have some…stuff we need to deal with." Love seemed to lose interest and concentrated back to his reading. Rose on the other hand seemed more interested and put down his guitar.

"What are you going to talk to him about?" Shinji stopped at the door and tried to quickly think of a valid excuse. He wasn't ready to admit he was going to negotiate back his old position as the captain of the fifth squad if the whole thing turned out badly for him.

"My gigai's busted, I need to get it fixed. And Shinji needs some work done too" Kensei said, earning a scornful look from the blonde man.

"Oh alright, have fun then" Rose bid them and walked over to Love, trying to read the manga over his shoulder. Shinji batted his eyes few times before Kensei grabbed his arm to drag him out.

"Why was Rose so quick to believe we were going to Urahara to get our gigais fixed?" the blonde man asked as they walked along the empty streets in the abandoned part of the harbor, "I mean, I can understand you since you've been bashing yourself around for weeks now but what about me?" Shinji took a long look at his faux body, prodding his sides and stomach with his nimble fingers. Kensei gave him a sideways glance and suppressed his smile. Shinji was actually quite vain, especially when it came to his appearance. _Wonder why, with that face, _Kensei thought and chuckled lowly as he observed the deeply disturbed look on Shinji's face. The man glared at him from under his blond fringe.

"What's so funny all the sudden?"

"Nothing" Kensei managed to say, quickly creating a few steps distance between them so Shinji wouldn't see the grin that was tugging his lips, "nothing at all."

* * *

Shuuhei slammed his hand against the table, trying to catch his breath. Opposite him Renji was looking at him with his shoulders bouncing from quiet laughter, a full saucer of sake in his hand. Shuuhei finally managed to draw in a deep breath, only to burst into laughter again. Renji shook his head in amusement and sipped on his sake so he wouldn't spill it as he lowered it back on the small table in front of him. He then leaned back, his hands idly on his lap as he continued staring at Shuuhei who was still shaking from the convulsions of his laughter.

"Don't overdo it" he warned him, a chuckle creeping into his own voice as he watched his friend's mirth. Shuuhei tried to behave himself but failed miserably, this time falling backwards and almost rolling around on the soft pillows they were sitting on. Renji started to laugh now as well, leaning his face into his hands as their combined laughter started to get louder, earning them strange looks around the tavern they were in.

"Okay, okay, I'm okay" Shuuhei finally managed and scrambled up from the floor, leaning his elbows on the table and pressing his knuckles on his forehead, a wide smile still gracing his face. Renji raised his eyes to meet Shuuhei's, and the men managed to stay quiet for good ten seconds before bursting into laughter once more.

"Oh gods, this is going nowhere" Shuuhei cackled almost tiredly now, trying to desperately steady his breath and calm down, "come on Renji, pull yourself together for God's sake."

"I can't" the redhead nearly whined, holding his stomach with his hands, "it hurts." Shuuhei leaned over the table to smack the man over his head, only to have his wrist grabbed into Renji's strong grip. The redhead smirked at him and pulled on his hand, almost making Shuuhei fall onto the table and into Renji's lap. Their faces were only inches apart now, both still chuckling quietly. Finally Shuuhei calmed down and then looked at Renji in the eye, the man's eyes were glinting with mischief and joy and slightly glazed from all the sake they had downed by now. A low laugh still slipped from Shuuhei's lips as he tried to determine whether the situation was funny or inappropriate. Finally Renji decided for him and pushed him back to his seat, giving him a somewhat scolding look.

"Play nice now, Shuu" he said jokingly, "you're taken." Shuuhei rolled his eyes at him and poured some sake on his saucer.

"We'll see for how long" he scoffed, staring at the jug of sake in his hand and took a long swig straight from the bottle. Renji raised his inked eyebrows at him, taking his own saucer into his hand and toasted it to his friend.

"What's that supposed to mean?" he asked as the sake burned his throat, he could feel the buzz of the alcohol behind his eyes. Judging by the slightly splayed look Shuuhei gave him he was also feeling it.

"Oh so you don't know? Or haven't noticed" he asked, leaning back on his seat, his hands holding the saucer on his lap, "things aren't actually going as planned."

"Do they ever?" Renji asked, pouring himself more sake, only to notice the jug was almost empty. He gestured for the waiter to bring more, the old man shuffled to their table and took the empty bottle with a deep bow. As he went away Shuuhei sighed and ran his hand through his spiky hair, looking at somewhere in the distance.

"I know that but…I thought things would get better, eventually."

"Haven't they then?" the redhead asked him, "I figured you'd be happier now, at least you seemed much happier after you came back." Renji didn't need to specify what he meant, they both knew what he was talking about.

"I was, I am" Shuuhei replied, craning his neck to one side to pop it, "it's just that…I don't know if this is going anywhere."

"Does it have to?" Renji queried, settling himself more comfortably on the pillows as the waiter brought them a new bottle of sake, "If you're happy, what needs to change?" He lowered his head a little and gave Shuuhei a long look from under his brows.

"Are you happy with him?" Shuuhei said nothing, his eyes avoiding Renji's piercing gaze. He had never been able to lie to him, no matter how much he would've wanted to, especially now.

"Shuu" the redhead said softly, "you can tell me, please." Shuuhei raised his eyes to meet Renji's and there was that miserably sad and anguished look that twisted Renji's insides into a tight knot.

"I…I'm not sure anymore" he managed to say, "but…But I can't say that, can I?"

"You can say anything you like Shuuhei, no one will think less of you."

"Yes they will" the young man sighed, "I can't feel like this, not after everything he…We went through."

"That doesn't mean you should be unhappy" Renji argued, "tell me, what exactly is wrong?"

"I…I thought I could handle this, but…I don't think I can."

"Handle what?" Shuuhei wringed his hands in his lap, his brows furrowing tightly together.

"I dunno, all the stress from the secrecy, from the looks, from not having him here…" Shuuhei sighed again, rubbing his temples, "I can handle it with him but not when I'm alone." Renji reached over the table again and grabbed Shuuhei's hand into his.

"Why don't you ask him to stay?" he asked, stroking Shuuhei's knuckles with his thumb. The young man smiled down as he looked at their entwined hands.

"Believe me, I've tried" he said, "it's just not that easy."

"Why not? Seems simple enough, I bet Ukitake would just need to say one word to the old man and he'd get his old job back in no time." A faint smile flashed on Shuuhei's face.

"That might be true" he said, squeezing Renji's hand gently, "but the problem is him, not the Soul Society." Renji arched an eyebrow at him.

"So he doesn't want to come back? Why?"

"He's been gone for over a century, coming back would be…difficult to say in the least."

"Well yeah but hiding in the Real World…" Renji shook his head, "I don't think it would compare to his previous life as a captain of the Seireitei."

"I know but still…They were judged as traitors and abominations, some still think so. How would you like to live in an environment like that?" Shuuhei gave Renji a weary look. The redhead just shrugged his shoulders, still holding onto Shuuhei's hand.

"Well you can't change how other people think, you can just decide not to care. Besides, if he came back and proved everyone that he's still a good captain and performs his duty as he used to he'd proof everyone wrong, wouldn't he?"

"I guess you're right" Shuuhei admitted carefully, his fingers slowly lacing with Renji's. He felt he could think more straight when Renji was there, he didn't feel the dark heaviness pressing on his chest or the stress that stifled his whole being.

"I know I am" Renji smirked at him, "you just seem to forget that, that's why we need to have these talks every now and then." Shuuhei hemmed and smiled at the redhead, looking more peaceful now.

"Thanks Renji, I…I know I'm a bad friend, though I promised I would…"

"Pfft, none taken" Renji cut him off with a scoff, "you have more on your plate than any of us, I get it. I don't blame you, nobody does. You just have to stop pursuing martyrdom like this and grab your man by the balls. Drag his sorry ass here and make him stay, you get to spend more time with him and it'll ease your workload. Problem solved." Shuuhei uttered a laugh, Renji always made everything sound so easy and simple.

"Why didn't I ask for your advice sooner?" he asked smilingly. Renji shrugged his shoulders with a wolfish grin on his face.

"As I said, you want to be this kind of a lonely rider, solving everything by yourself and never saying no when someone asks you for help. When was the last time you let someone help you out?" Shuuhei almost laughed but then actually started thinking about the question and realized he couldn't remember. All he had been doing for the past months was to say 'yes' to everyone and everything. _Well, almost everyone, _he thought with slight twinge of guilt. Once again he had put his duties before his friends and the things that actually made him happy. He smiled mirthlessly as he looked down at his hand that was still holding onto Renji's, he noticed he was squeezing it almost painfully hard. _No wonder I'm so wound up, _he thought as he loosened his grip, earning a long look and a kind smile from the redhead, _I'm like a drowning man trying to keep the boat afloat though I can't even swim myself. _

"So, now that that's settled" Renji smirked and grabbed the full bottle of sake, "may I propose a toast?" Shuuhei smiled back at him and pushed his saucer forward. Renji filled their saucers and raised his own to Shuuhei.

"To friends" he said, clinking their saucers together.

"To friends" Shuuhei concurred as they downed the sake, smacking the saucers back to the table with groans as the alcohol burned their throats.

"Puff, strong stuff", the redhead sneered, "another one?" Shuuhei's smile broadened as he offered Renji his saucer.

"Yes please."

* * *

Urahara didn't seem bit surprised as Kensei and Shinji appeared on his doorstep. Before the men had a chance to say a word the shop owner jumped up from his seat and started to walk to the back rooms, gesturing the Visoreds to follow. Kensei and Shinji exchanged curious looks but followed the weird scientist to the back of the shop, walking past the kitchen where Tessai was apparently cooking dinner. Urahara had made his way to his personal lab at the very back of the shop, a darkened room with tables filled with vials and other strange science equipment that sizzled and bubbled ominously. Few in- process gigais were stacked in one corner, looking eerily like real bodies. Urahara snatched off his hat and placed it on top of some chemistry set that contained various thick liquids that were moving around in the tubes as if they were living things.

"Sp gentlemen, what can I do for you?" the scientist asked, turning to face them with a wide smile on his face. Kensei folded his arms on his chest and cocked his head, he still didn't quite trust Urahara despite all he had done for them. Or maybe because of that.

"We had planned a short trip to Soul Society, as it were" Shinji obliged as Kensei stood beside him brooding as usual, "so we figured you could give us a hand." Kisuke raised an eyebrow, or at least Shinji thought he did, the gesture was somewhat covered by his mob of blonde hair.

"Interesting" the man said smilingly, leaning his hand on one of the tables, "and may I ask the reason for this particular visit?"

"Isn't it obvious?" Shinji said, then glanced at Kensei and nudged him with his hips as the man stayed quiet, "this loverboy here wants to go see his young darling, he's aching from yearning." Kisuke tilted his head to one side as he inspected Kensei's brooding appearance.

"As you can clearly see" Shinji added and had to quickly dodge a sharp kick to his shin, "anyways, would you be so kind as to help us out?" Kisuke's smile seemed to portray a mixture of emotions ranging from amusement to suspicion.

"But of course, I'd always love to help out a friend in need" he said, "but why are you going with him, if I may ask?" Shinji smiled back at him and Kensei felt like he was being caught in the middle of some sort of a smile- off, both men trying to make the other one strain their facial muscles first. _This is why I travel alone, _he shook his head.

"I'm just here for emotional support, as it were" Shinji blabbered on, "besides, I think we were granted the right to visit our old home after all we did to you, weren't we?" Kensei almost groaned out loud as he noticed the slight twitch in Kisuke's smile.

"After all _you_ did? Why yes, after all the Head Captain is known for his generosity and forgiveness" the scientist smirked, "that's why I'm still here, handling my little candy shop." Shinji's expression faltered but only for a mere split second.

"Well, we're only asking for a short visit, nothing more" he said, "so if you would, dear Kisuke."

"Oh, so it's 'dear' now, is it?" Kisuke chuckled, tapping his fingers against the wooden table, "haven't heard that from you in a long time, Shinji." Kensei frowned and threw a quick look at the blonde Visored who was clearly biting his tongue.

"Okay, don't help then, we'll ask Hachi to do it. If someone can lend him a hand" Shinji said and was already turning on his heel when Kisuke stopped him.

"Oh don't be so serious Shinji, I was merely kidding" the shop owner giggled, "of course I'll help a friend in need." Shinji looked as if he wouldn't even take up the offer anymore so Kensei leaned to his ear.

"Stop fucking around and just shut up" he grunted, "or I'll kick you into that wall." Shinji snorted but then swallowed it back when he saw the glare in Kensei's eyes. _Oh right, never go between a maniac and his boyfriend, _he reminded himself and turned back to Kisuke, that same Cheshire grin plastered to his face.

"Splendid!" he rejoiced, "Lead the way." Kisuke smiled, looking at Shinji from behind his mob of hair and Kensei was sure there was going on he was left out of.

"As you wish, my dear." Kensei frowned as Kisuke waltzed out of the laboratory and lead them to the underground training grounds. He nudged Shinji as they walked after the man and gave him a query look.

"What's all this about?" Shinji glanced quickly at Kisuke's back and shushed Kensei.

"I'll explain some other time, let's just keep our minds on the task at hand."

"Here we are, gentlemen!" Kisuke exclaimed as they descended the stairs.

"Yes, we've been here before" Kensei replied unimpressed. Kisuke beamed at him and swung his cane on his shoulder.

"I know, but I've made some alterations since your latest visit. Observe." Kisuke tapped his foot against the ground and suddenly the whole space started shaking, the stairs suddenly disappearing behind them. Kensei glared around them as the scenery started to change rapidly.

"What is this?" he hissed to Shinji who was scratching his head in wonder.

"Beats me" he replied and hopped to the side as a large tree sprouted out from the ground beside him.

"What are you playing at Kisuke?" Kensei shouted at the man who seemed quite unbothered by the sudden change of scenery.

"It's my newest experiment!" the man replied as he stepped aside to dodge another tree. Kensei saw now the mountains spilling out from the ground somewhere in the distance and suddenly realized the whole place started to look familiar.

"This is Soul Society" he said to Shinji, "I recognize that horizon." Shinji squinted as grass started to grow beneath their feet.

"Yeah, looks like it" he admitted, "but how…" The man was cut off as a branch suddenly hit him in the face, almost knocking him over. Kensei ducked down and managed to avoid getting beaten by a plant. Kisuke clapped his hands happily together as the scenery lost its final resemblance to the underground training area and they were standing in the middle of a thick forest on the outskirts of Rukongai.

"Works quite nicely, doesn't it?" the scientist asked as he walked to the Visoreds. Shinji was scrambling back to his feet and rubbed his nose.

"I made it after the fight in Karakura, I figured that the technique of moving one place to another one was very fascinating" Kisuke continued, leaning on his cane, "so I set up this transmission area, much easier to move from one place to another, especially with more than one person."

"So you have a permanent gateway to Soul Society? How's that different from the Senkai gates?" Kensei asked. Kisuke raised a finger in the air with a victorious look on his face.

"Permanent, and undetectable. I take it as a reward for my war efforts" the man said with a wide smile, chuckling to himself.

"I bet the Seireitei loves it" Shinji remarked, still trying to see whether his nose was now crooked.

"I keep changing the location every once in a while, it shouldn't leave any permanent trail unless someone happens to be right on location at the time we arrive."

"Handy" Kensei admitted, earning a joyous laugh from the scientist.

"It is, isn't it? Now, let's head to Seireitei, we don't have all day, do we?" Kisuke swung his cane around and started to walk through the forest, apparently into the direction of Rukongai. Shinji and Kensei exchanged long looks before they started following Kisuke. What other option was there?

* * *

It was already late as Renji and Shuuhei stumbled through the streets of Rukongai, leaning heavily against each other in order not to fall down. Renji's hair was spilling from his ponytail, their clothes were rumbled and Shuuhei had lost his shoe. In the back of his mind he was already dreading the next morning and the workload that was waiting for him but those thoughts were quickly erased as Renji nudged him between his ribs.

"We're here" he hissed under his breath. Shuuhei noticed they had arrived at the gates of Seireitei. The majestic walls reached high towards the sky and the huge gate was open, the gatekeeper was sitting idly beside it. Renji exhaled slowly and shook himself as if trying to shake off the effects of alcohol from his system.

"Just be cool and try to look sharp" he said to Shuuhei, though the point of his words was slightly impaired by the way he slurred them out of his mouth. But Shuuhei wasn't in the position to judge since he culd barely stand on his own so he just nodded, straightened himself and tried to look efficient. He managed it for about two steps before he started to sway to a completely different direction. Renji was quick to grab his arm and pull him back, almost knocking them both over as Shuuhei lunged into his arms. Both men started giggling drunkenly, then tried to focus again on the mission at hand and tottered towards the gates.

"Evening vice-captain Abarai, vice-captain Hisagi" the gatekeeper greeted them. Renji waved his hand in the air as he smiled widely at the man.

"'Tis a fine evening indeed, my dear sir" he slurred. Beside him Shuuhei snorted and tried to cover it with a fake cough. The gatekeeper raised an eyebrow at them, they both reeked of alcohol and looked as if they were just about to pass out standing up.

"As you were, gentlemen" he bid them as they made it inside the gates, swaying as they went.

"I can't believe we made it" Shuuhei mumbled as they patted on, now leaning against each other so that they almost fell over on each other's feet.

"If we can just make it back to our quarters without bumping into any captains, we should be fine" Renji replied, a shiver running through his spine from the sheer thought of encountering his own icy captain in his current state.

"Hey, let's go through here, it's a shortcut" Shuuhei suddenly said and dragged Renji into a narrow alley away from the main roads. The redhead obediently followed as they walked into a more desolate area within the Seireitei. The street wasn't as well kept as the others, the pavement was cracking and litter crunched under their feet as they walked. Renji screwed his eyes shut but as he only saw stars and the world suddenly started spinning much faster, he cracked them open with a groan.

"How do you know this route?" he asked Shuuhei as their surroundings began turning darker from the lack of streetlights.

"I've learned to find my way around during the years" the vice-captain said, "I've had some times when I wanted to move around without being noticed." Renji frowned but decided to say nothing, he wasn't at his most eloquent right now and he knew Shuuhei's past wasn't the most pleasant one. To his surprise they stumbled out of the alleyway and were now standing on the street that took them to the 6th squad's barracks. Shuuhei leaned his back against the nearest building's wall and closed his eyes tiredly. Renji sunk to the ground next to him, stretching his legs in front of him.

"Well, I had fun" he said after a short silence, a lazy smirk spreading to his face as he looked up at Shuuhei, "how about you?" Shuuhei raised his hand to his face and groaned quietly.

"I just keep thinking of the epic hangover I'm gonna have tomorrow" he mumbled as he massaged his temples, "I haven't been this drunk…Can't even remember when."

"A clear sign you haven't been hanging out with me enough lately" the redhead chuckled, his limbs felt numb and heavy. He raised his hand to grab the hem of Shuuhei's shirt and tugged on it.

"Sit down idiot." Shuuhei didn't have enough willpower left to resist and slowly slid down next to Renji. For good few minutes they just stared ahead of them in silence, the barracks were starting to get quiet this time of night. They could hear the night patrols walking around but otherwise there was not a soul on sight.

Shuuhei glanced at Renji as he heard the man rustling something from inside his shirt. The redhead drew out a crunched packet of cigarettes and a box of matches.

"I thought you quit." Renji hemmed as he took out one cigarette and placed it between his lips, then scratched a match from the ground and lighted up.

"I thought so too" he muttered back as he flicked the burning match away. He offered the packet to Shuuhei, who hesitated at first but then drew one out, Renji already lighting another match without even asking. He waited until Shuuhei's cigarette was burning and the young man had inhaled the first breaths of smoke before talking.

"So" he said, shifting his back against the cold wall behind him, "we good?" Shuuhei blew out a cloud of smoke from his mouth and smiled faintly at it.

"I didn't know we were anything else" he answered, throwing a long look at Renji. The redhead smirked back and blew out few smoke rings.

"If you say so." They enjoyed the blissful quiet and their slowly calming states of inebriation when suddenly Shuuhei frowned as he felt something on the edge of his mind.

"You feel that?" he asked Renji, turning to look at the man who was also frowning now, the cigarette hanging idly between his lips.

"Yeah I do" he grunted, snatching the cigarette from his mouth, "it's still far away but closing in fast." Renji jumped to his feet, Shuuhei following suit, discarding his cigarette to the ground.

"And it's coming this way." Shuuhei's frown deepened as he recognized the reiatsu he was sensing. His eyes widened and his breath hitched. _That's Kisuke, Shinji…and Kensei._

"It's him, isn't it?" Renji asked, noticing how Shuuhei instantly tensed up, "but he's not alone."

"No, he's with Urahara and Hirako" the vice-captain murmured quietly, "but why?" Renji shrugged, shaking his head as he tried to desperately sober up.

"Maybe he misses you" he guessed with a smirk, "you said he can be bit possessive."

"Well yeah but showing up here without any notice" Shuuhei started walking towards the source of the reiatsu that was closing in quickly, too quickly to go unnoticed by other Shinigami, "and why all three, he usually comes alone. And they don't even bother hiding their reiatsus, what the hell is going on…"

"They're in a hurry" Renji noted as he jogged to Shuuhei's side, "wonder how no one has notified us yet."

"Don't say anything yet" the vice-captain warned him as he thought whether he was sober enough to use shunpo to move. Drunken shunpo was one of the most dangerous things a Shinigami could attempt but the situation seemed to call for it. Renji seemed to notice his thoughts and grabbed him by the shoulder.

"Shuu, be careful" he said sternly, "I know you're brilliant but with the amount of sake we've had tonight…"

"I need to go" Shuuhei cut him off, gently pushing Renji's hand away, "I'm sorry Renji." With that and a flash he was gone. Renji felt out for his reiatsu that speedily moved on towards Kensei and his companions, they were just outside the Seireitei gates by now. The redheaded vice-captain scoffed and drew out his packet of cigarettes again, shaking his head as he lighted up. The smoke had lost its bitter taste along with his inebriation and now only dulled his senses even further. After the initial shock had worn out the vice-captain turned around to walk to his quarters, he had a feeling he wouldn't be needed tonight. _Not when he's around anyway. _Renji laughed out loud at his pathetic thoughts._You're such a sad little man, Abarai Renji. Always wanting what you can't have, doesn't that get bit old after few centuries? _

Renji shook his head as he walked on, passing by some young Shinigami recruits. Smoke blew out from his nostrils as he contemplated on his life and actions. Ever since Ichigo had blasted his way into Soul Society, grabbed it by the neck and shook it to its very core, nothing had been the same. That had been the time Renji had had to change his whole view on life, he had finally challenged his captain, achieved so much and been to hell and back, almost literally. And yet he still whined about such stupid things. Renji stumped his cigarette under his sandal as he finally got to personal quarters, quickly feeling out for his captain's calm reaitsu that was always present this close to his room. Even after years of serving under Byakuya Kuchiki, Renji was constantly impressed by the man, he was something else entirely. For a few fleeting seconds the redhead thought about knocking on the captain's door but discarded the idea with another shake of his head and an empty laugh. _Pathetic, _he thought as he walked into his own quarters, sliding the door shut behind him, only being faintly aware of the sudden spike in reiatsu by the Seireitei gates.

* * *

_Ah, still keeping the actual couple away from each other, how cruel of me...Don't worry, the last part will be all about Kensei&Shuuhei, this is all just one big fucking build-up. _


	3. Chapter 3

_**Alright, so I said "few days" but it ended up being few weeks. I just couldn't get it right first since I wanted to include all sorts of other things besides Kensei and Shuuhei's interactions but then it all went on for so long it would've been over 10,000 words easily and that's far too long for one chapter. So this is in four parts now (hope I can stick to it this time). This was more of a personal indulgence for me to return to this story and these characters, I enjoy writing all these characters interacting with each other (especially Kensei and Shinji and Renji is just awesome) so I wanted it to be fun for me rather than forced. I hope you don't mind the wait and the unplanned fourth part of this little drabble. The last bit is well on its way already, you will be glad to hear, since I cut this one short, but I'm still thinking of all the options on how to end this, I have few things I'd like to include but I'm not sure if this is the best place for them. Anyway, here's something to skim through while you wait.**_

* * *

**Part 3. **

Shinji raised his head up once they were getting close to the Seireitei gates, poking the rim of his hat up with his index finger as he sensed trails of familiar reiatsu lingering about.

"Huh" he muttered, glancing quickly at Kisuke who had surely noticed the same thing. Then he felt the slight shift in Kensei's reiatsu beside him, the man's brooding expression had only gotten worse during their trek to Seireitei. He had been able to sense Shuuhei's reiatsu all the way from Rukongai, which wouldn't had been that bad if it hadn't been accompanied by another familiar reiatsu belonging to a certain redheaded ex-lover of the said vice-captain.

"Looks like they have just gone through here" Kisuke noted, not even bothering to say who he was talking about. Kensei harrumphed, his hands clenching into fists as he shoved them into his pockets. Shinji patted him on the back.

"Keep cool Kensei, this is not the place to go apeshit" he noted in a low tone. The former captain merely grunted in return but kept his reiatsu in check, breathing in slowly through his nose. Shinji raised an eyebrow as he suddenly felt Shuuhei's reiatsu coming towards them with great speed.

"I'd say our welcoming committee is approaching" Kisuke remarked having noticed the same thing.

"Alone" Shinji said, more to himself than to the others but loud enough for them to hear. Kensei's brows knitted together and he stopped on his tracks. Kisuke flipped his fan open and hid his grin behind it, Shinji threw a meaningful look at the scientist. _He's clearly onto something here but fuck knows what it is. _

Within a minute Shuuhei's reiatsu had come close enough for him to appear in their sight as he landed just inside the Seireitei gates. He walked past the gate guardian, nodding a greeting at him as he went. Now Shinji noticed the slight wavering in Shuuhei's movements, his usually graceful stride was now stumbling ever so slightly as he hurried towards them. As the young man got closer Shinji could smell the sake and cigarette smoke on him and cursed mentally. _Talk about bad timing._

"Urahara-san, Hirako-san, Kensei" the vice-captain greeted them, saluting the former captains with a worried look in his eyes, "what are you all doing here?"

"Missed you too Shuuhei" Shinji quipped, only to be almost knocked down as Kensei strode past him over to Shuuhei. The young man's eyes widened as the burly man stood in front of him, despite being slightly shorter than Shuuhei Kensei was somehow able to look ten feet tall when he was pissed off, like he was now. His reiatsu was simmering quietly under his control but Shinji could feel Kensei was clearly straining to hold himself back. At first Kensei didn't even say anything, he just stared at the young man as he was trying to read his mind.

"Umh, hi" Shuuhei finally blurted out as the silence only continued.

"Where have you been" Kensei rumbled, it was more of a demand than a question.

"Out with Renji, I didn't know you were coming" Shuuhei replied, now frowning at the man's anger, "but why are yo-"

"This what you do when I'm not around?" Kensei cut him off, "Get shitfaced with your ex?"

"Ouch" Shinji hissed under his breath, earning a meaningful glance from Kisuke. Shuuhei took a step back and glared at Kensei, his own spirit power starting to flare.

"You're still hung up on that?" he spat out, shaking his head in disbelief, "I thought you trusted me."

"I thought I could trust you" Kensei retorted, "but you keep proving me wrong."

"Keep? What have I- No, this is ridiculous" Shuuhei said, tearing his eyes off Kensei, "I won't discuss this with you, not here." Kensei grabbed Shuuhei's wrist to keep him in place. Now the young man's eyes flashed dangerously and Shinji quietly shuffled backwards, his hand automatically reaching for his Sakanade.

"Should we..?" he hinted to Kisuke who was seemingly enjoying the show. The shop owner shook his head.

"Lovers' quarrel, best to keep away from that" he whispered, "and what could we do? An emotional argument was never won with logic, mind you."

"You know there's nothing between me and Renji" Shuuhei hushed, his voice straining under his control, "I'd never do that to you." For one desperate moment Shuuhei thought the man would argue against him but to his relief Kensei's grab on his wrist loosened and he lowered his head, his other hand scratching his neck.

"Sorry, I get riled up" he grunted back, "but I thought you were busy with your work, now I come here and you're drunk as a skunk." Shuuhei sighed and pressed his hand against his temples.

"Renji dragged me out to get me talking and loosen up, I haven't stepped out of my office during the past few weeks. Trust me on that." Kensei eyed Shuuhei carefully but he knew the young man would never lie to him.

"Sorry" he muttered again, his fingers now gently caressing the inside of Shuuhei's forearm, "I don't see always see straight when I'm stressed."

"That makes two of us" Shuuhei smiled faintly and took Kensei's hand into his own, tracing the lines on his palm with his fingers. Behind them Shinji sighed quietly and let his hand drop from the hilt of his Zanpakutou. Kisuke threw him a smiling gaze from behind his fan and chuckled lowly, his shoulders jumping.

"Oh yeah, like you knew that would happen" Shinji hissed at the man under his breath, then took another look of the now seemingly reconciled lovers and suddenly felt extremely out of place. Seeing that soft look in Kensei's eyes made him feel odd and unnecessary in the situation. Before he even said anything Kisuke had walked past the couple towards the Seireitei gates, waving his hand in a greeting to the gate keeper.

"Come now Shinji, we have people to meet and places to be" he hollered back at the blonde. The former captain snarled curses under his breath as he hurried after Kisuke, nodding to Kensei and Shuuhei in passing. The two men waited till the others were far enough before Shuuhei spoke, lacing his fingers with Kensei's.

"You wanna go talk somewhere private?"

"About what?"

"Why you're here, for example." Suddenly Kensei remembered the initial reason for his visit and a crooked smile flashed on his face, making Shuuhei arch an eyebrow at him.

"Oh yeah" he said, "that."

* * *

Sometime later when Kensei and Shuuhei had made it into the barracks of the 9th squad, more specifically into the back garden just behind the former captain's quarters, Kensei finally told Shuuhei why he had come into Soul Society without any notice. The young vice-captain's face lightened up as his lover told him that he was re-thinking the offer of coming back as the captain of his former squad.

"Are you serious?" Shuuhei gasped, then quickly shook his head, "Sorry, that sounded wrong, I just…You were so against it, I was sure you'd…"

"I had a talk with Shinji, he made me think about it bit more, with a cool head" Kensei explained, smile tugging his lips as he saw the excitement in Shuuhei's bright eyes, "turns out it might not be so bad after all."

"So have you talked about it to the others yet? What did they say?" Shuuhei almost had trouble containing himself as he already thought about the possible future they might share together if Kensei actually would take back his former seat as the captain of his squad.

"Whoa, slow down there kid, I haven't said 'yes' to anything yet, this is just all talk now" Kensei almost chuckled as he grabbed Shuuhei into his arms, wrestling the young man into a loose headlock and ruffled his hair. Shuuhei laughed as he struggled to get free but only ended up cuddled in Kensei's lap as the man finally stopped his antics. Shuuhei wrapped his arms around Kensei's neck, stretching his legs across the soft grass.

"I'd see you every day if you were captain" he mused out loud and smiled, "we could work together, I'd have more time and less stress."

"Sounds good, doesn't it?" Kensei mumbled as he ran his fingers through Shuuhei's hair.

"Yeah" the young man sighed, "yeah it does."

"So" the older man said slowly, cupping Shuuhei's chin to raise his face on level with his, "you want me to come back?" Shuuhei stared into Kensei's serious eyes and realized if he said yes, the man would most likely do it. He wasn't sure if it was just for him or if Shinji had said something to change his mind but he felt his chest almost ache with joy and his eyes burnt.

"Yeah, yeah I do" he breathed out with a laugh and pulled Kensei into a deep kiss, feeling the man's smile against his mouth, "I would love that." Kensei responded to the kiss almost feverishly, ravaging Shuuhei's mouth with his tongue. Shuuhei was still slightly taken aback by the man's passion, he'd rarely even touch him affectionately if there were others around but once they were alone, it was hard to get away from him. Not that Shuuhei minded at all, in Soul Society they couldn't flaunt their relationship publicly anyway and it made those private moments all the more precious.

"So what's next then?" the young man asked as they parted the kiss for a breather. Kensei clearly would've preferred to continue on the road of action they had taken but leaned back and thought about their next move.

"Well, first we'd have to make sure if it's even possible for me to come back, with that mess with the Central 46 and all" he started, making Shuuhei almost blush as he remembered the scene he had caused during his interrogation.

"But I'd guess it boils down to the big man himself, Yamamoto. If he shows us the green light, then it should be smooth sailing from thereon. What do you think, boy genius?" Shuuhei raised an eyebrow at the nickname but smiled back anyway, then rolled back on what Kensei had said.

"Wait, does 'us' here mean you and me, or you and someone else?" Few pieces locked in place in the imaginary puzzle in Shuuhei's head.

"Is that why Shinji's here, he wants to come back too?" Kensei smirked at Shuuhei's quick thinking, there was a reason why he was the vice-captain.

"He might've said something of the sort, yeah" the older man said, chuckling to himself as he thought of his friend's keenness of reclaiming his old position, "you think that could be possible too?"

"Well the fifth squad is still without a captain…And Hinamori…" Shuuhei's voice faltered as he thought of his friend's agony. She still had not fully recovered from the War and Aizen's treachery.

"Yeah, a captain would actually do them good. She's a very good vice-captain and capable but with all this… She's not really up to it." Kensei nodded, he had heard all about the relationship between Hinamori and Aizen and what all he had put her through. _The bastard, he has no soul. _

"Okay, so that might go through as well" he said, shifting his back to a better position against the tree he was leaning on, "so, you go to Yamamoto, tell him you need help and we're willing to provide it and what? We just saunter back?" Shuuhei shrugged, he hadn't given the details much thought after Kensei's initial distain for the whole idea.

"Guess so, the other captains would of course have to agree as well that you're fit to serve but I think that would be just a formality, since captains Ukitake and Kyoraku helped you out before." Kensei nodded but then groaned, all the talking was doing his head in. He was a man of action, he would've preferred to just walk up to Yamamoto personally and get this sorted but he knew there was a certain way with these things and it was best left to Shuuhei's more than capable hands. He eyed the young man slowly, he was still looking happier than he had seen him in a long time, his eyes shining and a wide smile gracing his sharp features, making him look younger and less tired.

"Come here" he bid him, pulling him gently to his lap. Shuuhei didn't resist, he pressed his body against Kensei's and closed his eyes as he leaned his head on Kensei's chest. He could still feel the world starting to spin slowly and breathed slowly to make the nausea stay away. Kensei stroked his hair gently and pressed a kiss on his forehead, the man smelled of sweat, cheap cologne and blood. Shuuhei had noticed the new faint scar on his arm which had probably come from sparring with one of the Visoreds. His fingers crept up Kensei's arm to touch the scar, tracing the jagged line that still had the trace of Hachi's reiatsu.

"You've been brawling again" Shuuhei murmured quietly, his eyes felt heavy and Kensei's presence made him feel save and warm. The man merely grunted in agreement and kept stroking Shuuhei's hair as he noticed the young man was slowly falling asleep. He shifted his legs to Shuuhei's sides so he could lay better on his lap.

"'Tis fine, Hachi fixed me up as usual" he said in a low tone, "don't worry about it."

"Okay" Shuuhei mumbled back, earning a light smile from Kensei. Usually Shuuhei would've scolded him for being too violent and rash, his voice betraying his sweet concern over him. Now he was too drunk and tired to care and actually believed him for once. Kensei waited for few minutes until Shuuhei's breathing slowed down and steadied, his body turned heavy and listless on Kensei's lap. The night was warm and quiet, Kensei tried to feel out for Kisuke and Shinji's reiatsu and could sense them somewhere around the barracks of the 8th division. _Figures, _the man thought and remembered how much Shinji had enjoyed the party he had taken part in the last time round. _No wonder he wants to go back._

Kensei waited for little longer until he was sure Shuuhei was fast asleep, then rose up and carried the young man back inside, finding his way into his private quarters. He lowered the young man into his bed and tucked him in. Then, after another long look at the vice-captain's calm expression he exited silently, sliding the door shut behind him. He would've liked nothing more than to fall asleep beside Shuuhei but he had something he wanted to settle before that. Kensei rolled his shoulders back as he tried to remember how to find his way to the sixth squad's barracks. He almost felt a shiver run through his spine as he felt out for one particular and very distinct reiatsu, the one that had lingered on Shuuhei's body for the whole night. Kensei could feel his anger flaring up again but repressed it with some effort, this wasn't something that could be solved with violence. _Though it might be the only way we both know best, _the former captain thought as he started walking towards his next destination, having found the person he was looking for. To Kensei's slight surprise the man seemed to be awake, his reiatsu felt alert and fluctuated slightly, though it might have been due to his drunken state. _Only one way to find out, _the man thought as his feet remembered their way through the maze of streets to the barracks.

Renji was sitting on the back porch of his personal quarters when he felt a heavy, strange reiatsu coming his way. With a sigh he pressed his eyes shut and thought about getting up but couldn't be bothered. Mostly because he was sure the man's reiatsu would instantly knock him off his feet if he came too close. The redhead was still too drunk to function properly and frankly he wouldn't have wanted to face angry Kensei even while sober. So he just waited, almost thinking the former captain would kick his door down but instead he heard the door to his quarters being slid open almost carefully and then slow, heavy steps as Kensei walked in. The door outside was open and Renji didn't bother hiding his presence so the man was quickly at the back, his expression brooding and dark as ever. Renji could tell the man was pissed off but was holding it back, not completely succeeding but enough so that he wasn't shredding his surroundings into pieces with his sheer presence. _Lucky for me I guess, _the vice-captain thought as he merely raised an eyebrow at the man who was still just staring at him, not saying a word.

"Evening" the redhead finally said, his voice harsh from all the drinking and smoking he had done that night. Kensei eyed the younger man slowly, his wild red hair wasn't tied up as usual but cascading down his shoulders and back. He was only wearing his casual dressing gown that was open to the waist and barely covered anything as the man was sitting cross-legged on the wooden porch.

"Hi" Kensei grunted back, looking around him in this small back garden. He could feel the sixth squad's captain's reiatsu being close, even Byakuya Kuchiki's spirit power felt cold and serious. Kensei turned back to Renji, wondering how this feral redhead with his body embellished in ink had come to being paired up with the most stuck-up man in the whole Soul Society. _Opposites attract, _the former captain mused as he still kept his distance to the man who had now turned his eyes away, staring somewhere far ahead.

"I suppose you wanna talk" Renji said in a casual tone, he sounded tired but Kensei could tell from his reiatsu and posture that he was still alert.

"Suppose so" the former captain pronounced slowly, taking a small step further into the back garden. Renji waited for him to sit down but as the man didn't approach him further he just sighed and gave up on trying to act logically with this man.

"I can't do this all on my own here, you came to me so just spit it out." Kensei's frown deepened as he still eyed his opponent quietly, trying to find some clues on how approach the situation. He was used to dealing with people who hid their true selves behind a veneer of lies and kept you on your toes trying to figure them out. But Renji here confused him because nothing in his demeanor let you to understand that there was anything else to him besides what you saw or heard, Renji didn't bother playing games or acting up. He was clearly ready for anything Kensei was about to throw his way, his near infamous fierce temper seemed to be quietly under control as he just waited for the former captain to have his say. On one hand it made things much easier but on the other hand it also made everything very awkward since Kensei realized that for once he could actually say what he thought and felt and he didn't want to admit some of those things out loud. But he knew that unlike with Shinji, Renji wouldn't let him off the hook and fill in the things left unsaid, if he wanted to talk he'd have to actually talk. With a disgruntled groan Kensei folded his arms on his chest and stared at a point somewhere in the distance. If he had to reveal his innermost ugly feelings to this man he wouldn't at least have to look at him.

"What's the deal with you and Shuuhei?" he finally asked. He almost waited for Renji to get defensive or just brush the question off, say that they were just old friends and nothing more. But instead Renji sighed again, his arms lying idly on his lap as he twisted the hem of his dressing gown.

"He's my friend and mentor, he helped me get through the Academy. And he was my lover at that time, we've been close ever since." Renji could feel Kensei's reiatsu almost slashing towards him, the dark essence of the Hollow was slightly overpowering the Shinigami side of it.

"But that was long time ago. I haven't slept with him in decades, we just have fun. Or we used to" the redhead paused for a second and Kensei threw a quick look at him, the young vice-captain had a plaintive look in his brown eyes.

"He hasn't been himself since Tousen took off, much less so after the War. I tried to help but he wouldn't let me. Can't say it didn't hurt. Then he went off to the Real World and came back with you" Renji turned his eyes to Kensei and the former captain could hear and almost feel the anger and jealousy in his voice. But he wasn't sure what Renji was jealous of, the fact that he was with Shuuhei or that he had been the one to return him to his former self, at least for a while.

"I said I'd be happy just knowing Shuuhei was fine again but it didn't really last like I had hoped. Then again, part of me is asking why you and not me, I've known him for decades and still he wouldn't let me help but you, you only knew him for few days and he gives you _everything_. Why? What the hell is so special about _you_?" Kensei stared at Renji and knew he couldn't answer the young man's question. He wished he could, it would probably make thing easier for everyone if he understood what the deal between him and Shuuhei was. But he hadn't known it when he first met the young vice-captain, it hadn't come any clearer when they had gotten to know each other and even now, when Kensei was ready to change his whole life for the young man, he couldn't even say why he felt like that. There was something that made him feel different when he was with Shuuhei, something he had never felt before and he yearned for it and sometimes he was frighteningly sure he'd lose his mind if he ever lost Shuuhei. He hadn't believed he could feel so strongly for someone and it scared him. Sometimes it scared him that he was so dependent on this one person and he wanted it to stop, maybe it would be easier to live alone without fearing losing him. It would be painful but easier.

"I don't know why" he said slowly, noticing the pained look in Renji's eyes, "I just know I can't…I can't be without him." Kensei waited for Renji to retort by asking then why weren't they happy, why was he even here and not with Shuuhei. But it seemed Renji knew better than that.

"It's a fucked up world, isn't it?" the redhead scoffed with slight bitterness in his voice, "The people you love the most are the ones you hurt the most, and vice versa. It would be easier just to let it go, wouldn't it?" Kensei nodded, leaning his shoulder against a wooden pillar that supported the canopy.

"But you can't, of course you can't" Renji added in a hushed tone and Kensei suddenly had the feeling the man knew exactly what he was talking about. _But I don't think he's talking about Shuuhei this time…He isn't the type of person to let someone go easily, they've had decades to get together if they really wanted to. _Kensei glanced towards the captain's quarters where Byakuya Kuchiki's reiatsu was still tangible in the air itself. _That would explain quite a lot actually. _Kensei turned his attention back to Renji who was quiet again, looking both tormented and serene at the same time.

"So, you're coming back now aren't you?" the redhead asked him with a slightly resigned tone. Kensei shrugged his shoulders.

"Seems like it" he said and glanced back at Renji, the man looked somehow compliant but serene at the same time.

"You don't mind?" the former captain pried, earning a one-sided grin from the redhead.

"Like I had any say in this" he snorted, throwing an amused glance at Kensei from the corner of his eye, "I know when I've lost."

"From what I've heard you don't usually care about that." The redhead chuckled again.

"That might be true yeah" he replied, shaking his head, "but not this time. I choose my battles more careful these days." Renji turned his head to look at Kensei in the eye and suddenly the former captain was almost relieved he didn't have to compete against this man.

"Good to hear" he said, and he really meant it. Renji seemed to hear that and smiled more genuinely this time, though his eyes were still dark.

"So are you gonna beat me up and tell me to stay the fuck away from Shuuhei or are we clear?" he asked, only sounding slightly amused. The corner of Kensei's mouth curled slightly upwards.

"If Shuuhei trusts you, so do I. So unless you give me a reason, I'll leave you alone."

"Good." The men stared at each other without saying a word, finally reaching some sort of a mutual understanding and possibly even respect. Renji cracked him a sudden wide smile and pushed himself up from the porch, tightening the sash that held his dressing gown.

"Well, this was educational" he said as he ran his hand through his long hair, "but I got work tomorrow and you have someone waiting for you." Kensei nodded and moved to walk out when he noticed Renji was holding out his hand to him. With only a split second's of hesitation the former captain took it and shook Renji's hand.

"Guess I'll see you around" the redhead noted, "captain."

"We'll see about that" Kensei replied but now there was more than just a hint of a smile tugging his lips. Renji let go of his hand and nodded towards the door.

"Go on, he's been waiting long enough." Kensei nodded at him and turned to leave, but then stopped, tapping the doorframe with his knuckles. Renji stared at his back, his head tilted to one side as he waited for the man to have his final say. Finally the man spoke, this time his voice was laced with concern that made Renji's chest tighten.

"Make sure he eats, okay? He's getting too skinny." Renji had to bite his lip and lower his head, managing only a quiet 'yeah'. Kensei seemed content with this and saw himself out of the room. As Renji as sure he was finally gone, he walked back inside, sliding the door close behind him. He shook off his dressing gown, letting it fall to the floor and crawled into bed naked, wrapping the cool sheets around his body as he curled into a fetal position in the middle of the large futon. To his luck the combination of too much alcohol and staying up this late made him fall asleep almost instantly, relieving him of his thoughts for the night. It saved him from much pain, if only for a moment.

* * *

Kensei was lounging back to his old quarters as he felt a strange tingling on the edge of his consciousness. Someone was watching him, someone who didn't really bother hiding themselves. Kensei sighed quietly under his breath as he stopped on his tracks to wait for his stalker to come out. _Can't a man catch a break here? _Kensei heard soft thud behind his back and then quiet steps as his stalker walked closer to him.

"Good evening, Muguruma- san." Kensei swallowed an audible groan but didn't turn around to look.

"I thought you'd be busy with people to see and places to be" he noted to the man who was still lurking behind him. He heard the familiar soft chuckle and the sound of a fan being flipped open, air gently wafting around.

"Well I _was_ busy, but then I figured your situation might be considered a priority at the moment" Kisuke replied as he finally walked to Kensei's side, his face shadowed by his hat and fan but his grey eyes gave out more than Kensei needed to know what the man was going to talk to him about.

"Where did you leave Shinji?" he asked the shop owner as he started to walk towards his destination again. Kisuke fell into step with him, his wooden sandals clacking against the cobbled stones.

"Ukitake is taking very good care of him, not to worry" he said, "as are near all the other captains as well. He's in good hands."

"No doubt about that." Kensei waited for Kisuke to get on with it but the man seemed to be perfectly content on just walking by his side, he even hummed out a small tune. Finally Kensei's patience snapped and he stopped, but Kisuke continued forward.

"What do you want, Urahara?" The scientist turned to look at Kensei over his shoulder, most of his face still covered by his fan and hat.

"What do you mean, Muguruma-san?" he asked with that infuriating tone that said he knew full well what Kensei meant but just wanted to act ignorantly to wind Kensei up for his own amusement. Kensei's reiatsu flared just so that the aura glowed around his body, earning a raise of an eyebrow from Kisuke.

"My my Kensei, you do have the worst of timings" he said in a light tone, flicking his fan shut and revealing his one-sided smile, "I suggest you calm down before someone comes to kick you out of here. And that's the last thing you'd want right now, isn't it?" Kensei grunted but regained his control again, still glaring at the amused former captain.

"You have a reason to be here instead of partying the night away with the others. Tell me." Kisuke's smile waned only for a second but then he bounced back, that same meaningless grin back on his face.

"Alright then, I'm sorry if I have upset you, Muguruma- san" the man said as he tipped his hat to him and stared into space for a while before continuing, "I just needed to talk to you before you do any rash decisions." Kensei frowned but wasn't surprised, of course Kisuke would know the real reason for their visit, he was the smartest man Kensei knew.

"What about it?" Kisuke shrugged his shoulders, the green fabric shifting along the gesture.

"Just wanted to make sure you knew what you're getting yourself into." Kensei scoffed derisively, tilting his head to one side.

"I've been a captain before, remember? Don't think things have changed that much in mere one century."

"Maybe Soul Society hasn't but you definitely have" Kisuke said and turned his grey eyes back to Kensei, looking serious and somewhat sad. Kensei's eyes narrowed at the look, after the War it hadn't been that odd to see the shop owner like this but it still caught him off-guard.

"I know that, don't think I'm stupid…" he started but was quickly cut off.

"Then don't you think the powers at be here at Seireitei are stupid either" Kisuke remarked sharply, "just because you were left alone since all the captains swore for you doesn't meant they have forgotten. Unless you swear allegiance to the Seireitei and Gotei 13 I doubt they'll even consider letting you back in." Kensei's reiatsu bristled under his control but he knew it was true. Of course things wouldn't be so simple, they'd have to compromise.

"I know how much you want this Kensei" Kisuke said in a softer tone, "but you have to be prepared for the worst." Kensei nodded solemnly, he had been too brash, Shinji and Shuuhei had drawn him in with their enthusiasm and idyllic images of the possible futures.

"So what do you suggest?" he asked, suddenly feeling like he wanted to be anywhere but here.

"Just take it easy, and be patient. Good things come to those who wait" the former captain said, his trademark smile flashing briefly on his lips, "and in the meantime, go to him. He needs you more than he'll ever tell you, or than you'll ever know." Kensei cocked an eyebrow at Kisuke but didn't question his words, the man had proven to be right more times than he could count.

"Alright, just as long as you go and look after Shinji, I still don't trust him being left alone here" he said as he started walking again, wondering if he would finally actually make it back to Shuuhei. Kisuke tipped his hat to him again before he was gone in a flash of shunpo. Kensei noticed his hands were clenched into tight fists again and tried to exhale slowly to calm himself down. Too much had been happening that day already, he could feel a headache hammering behind his eyes. He just wanted to be next to Shuuhei and not think anymore, about returning to Soul Society, about Renji or Shinji or anyone else, just be with the one person for whom he was jeopardizing everything. _But then again, I don't really have that much in my life as it is so there's not that much to lose anyway, _he reasoned as he made it slowly back to his old division, his feet dragging slightly under him. He slid the door open to Shuuhei's room and tip- toed across the room to slide on the futon next to the young man. He was still fast asleep, snoring ever so slightly and he had curled into a fetal position, his arms were squeezing a pillow in his lap. Kensei watched over him for a minute before settling behind his back, his breathing gradually syncing with Shuuhei's.

As if nothing else existed in the world around them, Kensei felt at peace as soon as he felt Shuuhei in his arms, the young man's weight as he leaned back on him, his reiatsu that was fluttering slightly in his drunken state. Kensei's hands idly caressed the young man's bare skin, tracing the battle scars and the smooth skin between them and buried his face to the crook of Shuuhei's neck. After weeks of being apart he could almost feel being revived by Shuuhei's mere presence, his inner turmoil was calming down and he could feel his inner Hollow purring quietly inside his soul. If anyone had seen the serene smile on Kensei's face he probably would've had to kill them just so that the information wouldn't spread outside this room. He knew Shinji and the others would never let him live this down, they were giving him hard time all ready each time he visited Soul Society. Shinji claimed he had an aura of glee around him every time he came back, though even if it was true it changed the second Shinji opened his big mouth. Kensei shifted slightly on the futon, hooking his leg around Shuuhei's feet. He felt exhausted and tightened his grip around Shuuhei's slim waist, he could swear the young man had lost weight since the last time he had seen him. _I'll take him to dinner tomorrow, he deserves some off time, _Kensei thought as his eyes slowly closed. _If we get any time alone that is, I haven't had a second's break today…_

* * *

_And I cut him off. To be continued hopefully in the near future with the very likely final chapter of this insanity. Till next time!_


	4. Chapter 4

_**Argh, finally done! I hate writing endings. Who doesn't? I had another version of this that was about thousand words shorter but I figured I'd keep it all in anyway. Hope you all liked it, I enjoyed writing this hugely (and there's still the possibility for another sequel, if I ever feel like missing these guys again...) and I think the writing is maybe somewhat better than in my other stories at the moment. If you felt like something was missing let me know, I know there is a lot attention on the supporting characters too but personally I liked that, the main focus is still on Kensei and Shuuhei and their relationship. Sigh, I could've written so much more but I had to cut this at some point. As I said, there's still the possibility for another sequel, there just isn't enough stories on this pairing! Anyway, read and review and enjoy!**_

* * *

**Part 4.**

Shinji whistled happily as he strolled along the quiet streets of Seireitei. An early rise and a trip to the healing pools of the fourth squad had effectively washed away his hangover and he felt like a new man. He had even managed to run away from the members of the fourth squad who hadn't been that happy seeing a stranger bathing in their pools at seven in the morning. Shinji had had to make his escape in the nude and then grab some change of clothing from the nearest laundry room he could find. It felt weird and nostalgic at the same time to wear the old Shinigami uniform, he just now hoped he wouldn't bump into anyone who knew him, it might send out the wrong message. _Now if I could just find Kisuke or Kensei, that would be great…_Shinji peeked around the corner and dashed along the street as no one was around. He wasn't far from the ninth squad's barracks so he was practically out of the water by now.

"Hirako Shinji." The blonde man froze almost midstride as he heard his name being said in much colder tone than he would've liked. He swirled around with his usual smile plastered onto his lips, ready to face whatever was waiting for him. But he wasn't expecting this.

Byakuya Kuchiki walked slowly towards him, his captain's haori fluttering around him like a superhero's cape and his gentile features were fixed into that regal stoic frown that said 'out of my way, peasant'. Or at least that's what Shinji thought.

"Ah, Kuchiki-san, how nice to see you. How are things? I heard your sister is a vice-captain now."

"Spare me the pleasantries Hirako. Why are you wearing a Shinigami uniform?"

"What? This? Errr…" As Shinji's brain was going on overdrive to think up a valid excuse while being pierced by those ruthless eyes, he sensed a familiar reiatsu suddenly appearing behind him.

"Kuchiki-san, what a nice surprise! Out on a morning stroll, are we?" Kisuke patted to Shinji, lowering his hand on the man's shoulder seemingly uncaring of his present attire. Byakuya's brow twitched in annoyance, despite Kisuke helping them defeat Aizen the captain had little patience for the shop keeper's antics. His gaze darted quickly between the two men and there was a change in his eyes that Shinji didn't really like.

"I should have known you were part of this, Urahara. Just make sure he does not wander off looking like that or I will personally throw both of you out." Byakuya turned on his heel with a flashy flip of his haori and walked away, leaving puzzled Shinji with the ever jolly Kisuke. After he was sure the noble was beyond earshot, Shinji exhaled heavily and wiped his forehead in an exaggerated gesture. He turned to Kisuke, who was clad in his usual green number, though his signature hat was missing.

"Where's your hat?" Shinji asked, pointing at the man's head where the object in question should've been.

"Where are your clothes?" Kisuke asked with a raised eyebrow. Shinji weighed on the option on telling Kisuke the truth but opted out, the man knew too much as it was.

"Never mind. Where's Kensei, shouldn't we be heading out anyway?" Kisuke's grin softened into a thoughtful smile and he hummed pleasantly, earning a frown from Shinji.

"What's up with you today?" he asked and moved his eyes to the man's hand that was still on his shoulder, "Did Shunsui break out something special once I was out cold?" The shop keeper chuckled and nudged his head towards the ninth squad's barracks.

"Come now, the lovers are probably already waiting." Shinji stared at Kisuke's receding back for few seconds before hurrying after the man. _Should've learned better not to ask anything, he just gets more cryptic by the decade._

They walked in silence until Shinji could sense both Kensei's and Shuuhei's spirit power in the vice-captain quarters. Kisuke walked to the door and knocked gently on the door frame. They could hear low murmur from the room before there were heavy footsteps coming to the door and it was pulled open. Somewhat groggy looking Kensei, wearing only a towel hastily wrapped around his waist, was leaning on the door frame, rubbing his face with his hand and trying to focus his eyes on the visitors.

"Top of the morning to you, Muguruma- san! Did you sleep well?" Kisuke asked and quickly slipped inside the room before the former captain had a chance to protest. He did manage to grab hold of Kisuke's coat before he got very far and pulled him back, facing the smiling man with an angry glare.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, managing quite a growl at this early hour.

"Good morning Urahara-san" a much softer voice greeted them from inside the room. Shuuhei was tying the sash of his dressing gown as he walked over to them, just now noticing Shinji standing at the door.

"And good morning to you too, Hirako-san. Did you have a nice evening at captain Kyoraku's?" the young man asked. He looked at Kensei who was still holding onto Kisuke and frowned slightly.

"Kensei, please let our guest go." Shinji would've wanted to take a photograph of Kensei's face at the exact moment as he was conflicted between keeping up his appearances in front of his friends and complying with his lover's wish. With somewhat hilarious flash of expressions on his face Kensei finally let Kisuke go, throwing a quick look at Shinji that promised much pain if he ever dared to speak of this to anyone.

"So refreshing to meet someone with manners" the shop keeper noted as he turned to the young man. Shuuhei didn't look so happy, he was wearing a slight frown and his posture was tense.

"Is something wrong Urahara-san? I know you can't stay for long but…" Shuuhei glanced at Kensei who was looking worried as well, though he disguised it by wearing his usual astute mask of an expression. Shinji could more sense than see his worry. He was also slightly surprised as he noticed that Kensei's Hollow, though present in his reiatsu, was awfully quiet and almost…_Content? _Shinji flinched at the notion, he didn't even dare to guess the reason for this. He looked curiously at Shuuhei, the young man seemed to be fine, more so than yesterday when they had arrived. He looked rested and almost serene, not wound-up and fidgety like he had. Still, Kensei's Hollow was acting bit strangely. Shinji could remember how it had taken over seeing Shuuhei with someone else. _Maybe it's happy now when they're together, it's…Satiated? _Shinji tried to repress thoughts of how that could be achieved.

"I just wanted to stop by to see how you were, you didn't look that good last night when we arrived" Kisuke chatted away nonchalantly. Shuuhei smiled shyly, a faint spots of red staining his cheeks.

"Yes, sorry about that, if I had known you were coming I wouldn't had…"

"It's perfectly fine, I understand" Kisuke dismissed with a wave of his hand. Kensei had now turned to Shinji and was eyeing him curiously.

"What?" the blonde man snapped as a cocky half-smile crept on his friend's face.

"Where are your clothes?"

"Where are yours?" Shinji retorted but then quickly raised his hands, "No wait, don't wanna know." Kensei's sneered at him and turned his attention back to Kisuke and Shuuhei.

"So nothing is wrong? Have you talked with the captains about the…" Shuuhei paused as he exchanged looks with Kensei to see if it was okay for him to ask such things.

"About these two coming back? Well, I may have hinted at it during the course of the evening" the shop keeper said evasively, "and as you could guess, most of them don't object to it. The oldest captains knew them over a century ago and despite everything, they seem to be willing to let Muguruma- san and Hirako-san come back as captains. They have proven their worth many times." Shinji smirked smugly whereas Kensei still kept his scowl on. Shuuhei on the other hand seemed elated as he looked at his partner.

"Hear that Kensei, that's good right?" he said and Shinji nearly snorted at how excited he sounded, the young man was almost jumping up and down. But Kensei still didn't join in, he glanced at Kisuke whose face was unreadable at the moment.

"Yeah well, there's still a lot of work to do before we can say anything for sure" the former captain said. Shuuhei's face fell and it was clear how Kensei hated himself for making the young man feel like that.

"I, I thought you'd be happy…" Shuuhei's voice trailed off as he realized this might not be the time for this conversation. Shinji tried to slowly back away from the room but Kisuke stayed defiantly still.

"Hisagi- san, you knew this wouldn't be so easy" Kisuke said in a low tone though even he felt bad seeing the young man's pained expression. The longing in his eyes was just too much to bear.

"I know, I know, but I…I had hoped they could…Make an exception in this case, it is a very unique situation after all" Shuuhei rambled, his hands shaking slightly. In a second Kensei had closed the distance between them and pulled the young vice-captain into his arms, stroking his messy hair with gentleness that was almost unbecoming of him. He whispered something into Shuuhei's ear that seemed to calm him down for the moment. Shinji was chewing on his lower lip, he felt like an intruder just by seeing this exchange, Kensei would smash his head in the second they got back home just because he stood here now witnessing this tender moment. _That bastard Kisuke, he's making me take all the beating for this…Son of a bitch._

"I will come back, I promise you" he heard Kensei murmur to Shuuhei, and even Shinji didn't doubt what the man said when he was like this.

"But when?" the young man asked, his voice straining as he tried to hold himself together. Kensei pressed a kiss on his forehead, his thumbs stroking Shuuhei's face.

"Sooner than you'll know. You're strong" the former captain said, and then cracked a more than a rare smile at his lover, "and as my vice-captain, you need to get used to handling all the red tape for me. So this is good practice for that." Shuuhei stared at Kensei for good few seconds before he smiled back, grabbed the man's face into his hands and kissed him hard on the lips, making him almost stagger.

Shinji turned away, but noticed that Kisuke was smiling that weird, all-knowing grin again. _He's been doing some magic here too. I knew it. That sly bastard, when does he learn not to meddle into things? _Shinji didn't now care that Kisuke's meddling had saved their lives many times in the past and would probably continue to do so, he was just pissed off that the scientist looked so pleased with himself as if he had personally concocted the whole thing. _Wouldn't fucking wonder if he had. Arranged for Shuuhei to come to the Real World, use some love potion on Kensei, the whole escapade. He's like some bored-out-of-his-mind puppet master. And a perverted one at that._

"Right, so, we should probably get going, I've already sensed some mild hostility towards us and I wouldn't want to start the preparations on the wrong foot altogether" Kisuke said, finally making Shuuhei and Kensei let go of each other.

"You mean you two got drunk and probably managed to insult someone and now you just gonna run away" Kensei scoffed, still holding the young vice-captain to his side. Shuuhei almost seemed to melt into the man, their arms wrapping around each other and even legs hooking behind other's knees. It was a wonder they even could stand like that.

"Oh hush now Muguruma-san, you're such a pessimist."

"Well then where's your hat? And I don't even want to know about Shinji's clothes." Kisuke looked surprised and patted himself on the head as if he had just noticed his lack of headgear.

"Oh dear, you're right. I seemed to have misplaced it. Well, all the more reason to go and find it before we leave."

"Can't you stay?" Shuuhei asked Kensei in a hushed tone, not meant for the others to hear. The man tilted Shuuhei's head up by lifting his chin up with his finger.

"I said I'd come back soon enough. Be patient, kid." He kissed Shuuhei again and then leaned closer to his ear to add something that made the young man's face burn red.

"You two go ahead, I'll get my clothes" Kensei said as he pushed Shuuhei towards the bedroom. Now even Kisuke's nonchalance ended and he quickly hurried away, sliding the door firmly shut after them.

Once outside, the duo stayed quiet for a while, Shinji because he had no idea what to say and Kisuke because he was too deep in thought to voice anything out just yet.

"You know, I was going to ask for an explanation for all this shit" Shinji finally uttered, making Kisuke snap his head towards him, "but on second thought, either you wouldn't tell me the truth, or worse, you would and I'd have nightmares for the rest of my life." Kisuke let out a sound that was almost a giggle as he started walking away from the vice-captain's quarters.

"Ah Hirako-san, sometimes you bring me such joy" the scientist smiled as the former captain followed him few steps behind.

"Wish I could the same thing to you" Shinji muttered under his breath. Suddenly Kisuke stopped, clapping his hands together.

"Now I remember where I left it!" the man exclaimed happily and turned to Shinji, who was now wary of what was to come next.

"I left it at the first squad's barracks. Silly me, but I needed to go visit the old man anyway. This is excellent Shinji, well done!"

"I'm not going to go see Yamamoto…"

"Oh hush, of course you are, a future captain needs to be in good terms with the old man. You can refresh some memories, talk about the good days, all that." Shinji bristled quietly as he noticed his feet were still taking him to the same direction as Kisuke, cursing the man to the lowest pits of Hell.

"I hate you" he muttered under his breath, earning a light laugh from the man.

"Such joy" Kisuke smiled.

* * *

When Kensei met up with Shinji and Kisuke an hour later, both men had recovered their missing clothes and were bickering as usual, Shinji snapping angrily at amused Kisuke, who seemed to get off by riling the other man up. Shuuhei had insisted on seeing them off despite his own duties and tasks that were waiting for him.

"_I've been cooped up in that office for too long anyway, my subordinates are starting to give my weird looks", _the young man had told Kensei. The older man had shaken his head in disapproval.

"_I know you're busy but that's just ridiculous. Your subordinates need to trust that you can cope with your work, if you start to look like the walking dead you're doing something wrong. Learn to delegate, kid." _Shuuhei had smiled, Kensei had unknowingly said almost the exact thing as Renji had. The young man had inadvertently made a quick comparison between the two men and realized maybe they weren't that different, despite they didn't really get along. For the first time in days Shuuhei had heard Kazeshini scoff derisively in his head, the spirit had been awfully quiet for the past few weeks. Maybe it had been so bored with him being busy with tedous paperwork it just hadn't bothered to even annoy him.

"_And we all know why's that", _the vengeful Zanpakutou had snorted at Shuuhei's notion of Renji's and Kensei's strained relationship, _"he doesn't like to share. And considering the guy he's up against, I'd be pretty pissed off too."_

"_They're not competing over anything", _Shuuhei had argued, _"Renji's just a friend, Kensei knows that. He's just…"_

"_Jealous, I know. It's painfully obvious, don't you think? I mean, you just have to feel his reiatsu when he's near you, that Hollow of his is just…"_

For once the spirit had gone quiet, lost for words to describe the strange feeling both it and Shuuhei got in the presence of Kensei, the feeling of his reiatsu wrapping around Shuuhei. It wasn't a completely disagreeable feeling but there was something strange to it that Shuuhei couldn't name. He understood that the Hollow side irked his Shinigami instincts but he had slowly grown to it, nowadays it didn't bother himhalf as much as it had in the beginngin. The weirdest thing however was that it was most prominent when he and Kensei were alone, especially during their intimate moments.

Sometimes it scared Shuuhei, invoking memories of the first times the young man had met the former captain and how his Hollow had taken over him in his jealous rage. That hadn't happened since, which was of course a relief, but also made Shuuhei ponder the reasons why. Kazeshini cackled inside his head again, the spirit obviously found the situation funny.

"_I'm still amazed you even bother hiding this little affair of yours, since while he's here you make so much noise anyway that everyone within two miles is bound to hear it" _the spirit jeered, making Shuuhei's face burn.

"Shut up" he muttered under his breath, earning a strange look from Kensei walking beside him.

"You okay kid?" The vice-captain snapped his head up and flashed an embarrassed smile.

"Yeah, just thinking out loud" he said and tried to change the subject, waving his hand towards Shinji and Kisuke, "Hirako-san has found his clothes I see." Kensei glanced at his fellow Visored and a grim smile appeared on his face.

"I'm still going to ask him what happened. In front of everyone else." Shuuhei shook his head and laughed, Kensei's dark and somewhat immature sense of humour was also something that reminded him of Renji. Shuuhei wanted to kick himself as he heard Kazeshini sniggering in his head again.

"_I said shut it" _he ordered the spirit, this time silently. He could see the red and black creature make faces at him and cackle like a petulant child. Shuuhei still didn't understand, and didn't even want to, what part of his soul the spirit was supposed to present. He could understand the repressed feelings of hatred and jealousy but sometimes he was sure the creature also depicted some part of him that was supposed to be his sexuality. That would at least partly explain why, despite all his jeering and mocking, Kazeshini seemed to get very excited every time he was alone with Kensei. Sometimes Shuuhei was sure the spirit was almost flirting with Kensei's Hollow, its usual sneering changed into something resembling a low purr and Shuuhei could swear his own reiatsu sought out the Hollow side of Kensei's spirit power.

Judging by Kazeshini's silence the spirit itself didn't want to admit that to Shuuhei, maybe even the vengeful spirit that was actually somewhat similar to the raw Hollow didn't like the idea of being attracted to basically an evil being that it usually considered an enemy. Shuuhei didn't know what to make of the idea, but it didn't seem to hurt either of them and Kensei had been acting relatively calm as of late so maybe there was no need to worry.

As Kensei and Shuuhei came close, Kisuke waved his fan at them and Shinji nodded, glancing over his shoulder as if waiting for someone to jump on him.

"Hello again, Hisagi-san, Muguruma- san" the shopkeeper greeted them amiably as ever, "ready to leave?" Kensei and Shuuhei exchanged meaningful looks with each other, there was no need for words at this point. Kensei reached his hand out to stroke Shuuhei's hair and neck, quickly pressing their heads together briefly before kissing the young man on his forehead.

"Take care kid" Kensei murmured before letting go, Shuuhei's hand twitching to grab hold of him but then pulled back. Shinji was averting his eyes from them again, he had witnessed enough heartbreak to last him for few months by now. Kisuke had hidden his face behind his fan and hat, only his twinkling eyes visible. Kensei turned to the shop keeper and took few steps away from Shuuhei, the vice-captain fidgeted on his place as he watched them get ready.

"Let's go" Kensei grunted, he was obviously anxious to leave as quickly as possible to make it easier. Shinji frowned slightly but said nothing, he had too noticed the slight change in the air that beckoned them to leave as soon as possible.

"Ready when you are" Kisuke said and tipped his hat to Shuuhei, "it was nice seeing you again, young Hisagi-san."

"You're welcome anytime, Urahara-san, Hirako-san" the young man replied with a genuine smile, though his eyes were fixed on Kensei.

"I will take you up on that" Kisuke replied before he turned to his two comrades, "now gentlemen, shall we?" Both former captains nodded in unison and Kisuke turned, waving his hand in the air to open up the Senkaimon gate.

"No fancy tricks this time?" Kensei muttered under his breath, more to Shinji and himself than to Kisuke. The shopkeeper glanced at him over his shoulder, his smirk hidden behind his fan.

"There is a time and a place for everything, Muguruma-san" he said, "but I sense that we'd be best to keep a low profile for the time being, wouldn't you agree?" Kensei raised an eyebrow but didn't argue against him. Kisuke stepped into the gate, Shinji quickly following suit.

Kensei exhaled slowly and then, with little hesitation, stole one last glance at Shuuhei. The young man's expression was hard to read, it was somewhere between longing and relief and Kensei knew his own face mirrored the same expressions. Shuuhei gave him a small smile and waved his hand to him, trying to act as if his heart wasn't bursting from its seams. Kensei flexed his fingers in a somewhat similar gesture and held eye contact with Shuuhei until the gate closed behind him. Part of him wanted to immediately go back and stay there with Shuuhei, another part was slightly relieved that he was going back home, the constant tip-toeing around got on his nerves. Kensei turned to face ahead again and had to hurry his steps to catch up with Shinji and Kisuke.

_Home…_Kensei didn't know what to make of that concept anymore, it had taken him decades before he had started to even think of their dwelling in the Real World as a home, and it wasn't actually that cozy even now. Despite having resided in the Real World for a century, Kensei could never really call it a home, it wasn't natural for a soul to live among the real humans, the living. He could never really fit in and living as a sort of a ghost with a very limited choice for what they could actually do didn't suit him. It was difficult to develop any relationships with real people since the Visoreds didn't age normally and in time that would've become a problem. Of course they interacted with normal people, they had to just in order to survive but beyond casual, everyday exchanges with the cashiers and so on, there was little they could do.

Kensei had restrained himself from developing any deeper personal involvements with the living, but many of his friends had done the opposite. Sometimes it had worked out fine, other times not so well. Kensei entertained the thought of counting the times Kisuke had had to help them out once one of the Visoreds had taken the game a step too far and needed someone to clear up their mess. Subtle amnesia here and there and everything was back to normal, except for the Visored in question.

Kensei could remember seeing Shinji pine after one mortal woman after another, the stupid man didn't seem to learn. Rose was another hopeless romantic and was often seeing writing poetry or other such nonsense for his current object of fascination. Love was more of a cooler persona and kept his relationships to himself, but he had been known to more than once to disappear somewhere into the night and coming back only in the wee hours of the morning. Kensei had noticed that the women were much more straightforward in their social lives concerning the living, Mashiro was a confounded maneater, Lisa had her strings of lesbian lovers, and Hiyori… He didn't dare to even hazard a guess of what that vicious little creature did with her spare time.

Kensei could finally see the light at the end of the tunnel and soon they were all back in the underground bunker of Kisuke's shop. The shopkeeper turned to face them as if waiting for applause for the successful trip. Kensei glanced at Shinji who was still looking bit peeved, maybe from spending too much time alone with Kisuke. Kensei could relate to that.

"So, gentlemen, where are you off to next?" the shopkeeper asked them.

"What do you think?" Kensei replied, dusting his clothes. Shinji kicked the ground with the heel of his shoe, his hands shoved deep into his pockets. Kisuke tilted his head to one side, the two men looked like scolded children.

"No need to be so rude, Muguruma-san, I was only being friendly", he replied, "though I have absolute no need to be." Kensei stared at Kisuke for a second and then turned away, he didn't have the energy for this right now.

"How are things gonna go from here?" Shinji finally piped up. Kisuke shrugged his shoulders, now feeling how both the Visoreds were looking at him intently, waiting for answers.

"Depends on how quickly young Hisagi can proceed with things, I did drop hints to the older captains so they might be able to speed things up a bit. But as of now, all you can do lay low and wait." Kisuke eyed the two former captains and knew exactly which one would find that more difficult. Kensei's reiatsu was already bristling.

"How long" he asked, then before Kisuke had time to answer he added, "approximately?" Kisuke lolled his head from one side to another, tapping his cheek with his fan.

"Few weeks, few months, who knows? This is quite unheard of so it might take longer than usual or maybe, if you're lucky, it's only a matter of days. It all depends on the Head Captain at this point."

"But don't we need just for the other captains to swear for us and that should be enough? They know our abilities already so there shouldn't be a need for the tests" Shinji put in.

"Well technically yes, but you must understand that this is all very unique and new" Kisuke explained, "despite having saved the Soul Society from Aizen, your Hollow abilities are still an abomination according to the law. Having to find a way around that might take some time." Kensei grunted and looked away, Shinji swung back and forth on his heels.

"Okay, so now we just play the waiting game" the blonde Visored concluded, throwing a look at his comrade, "you wanna go home Kensei?" The man didn't answer, just turned around and started walking to the stairs. Shinji sighed and shook his head, noticing how Kisuke was staring at him.

"What?"

"Oh nothing" Kisuke was quick to say and avoided Shinji's eyes. Shinji glared at him for a second, then scoffed and gave up, he had had enough of the shopkeeper's weirdness for the day.

"Fine, let us know if you hear anything, okay?"

"Yes, absolutely, definitely" Kisuke said, still staring at the made-up sky above them. Shinji gave him one last weird look before running after Kensei, the man had already gone far.

Shinji managed to catch up with Kensei few blocks from Kisuke's shop, to his surprise the man wasn't using his shunpo to get around but was moving on foot. Very briskly, but still.

"Oi, slow down there big guy!" Shinji shouted after him, though his words had no effect on the man. As he finally made it to Kensei's side, the effects of last night's party made his stomach turn. He leaned his hand on Kensei's shoulder as he tried to steady his breath.

"Woo, we've definitely been gone for too long, I used to be able to handle sake much better than this" Shinji wheezed. Kensei said nothing and Shinji drew his hand away, sensing the man's irritation on his reiatsu.

"Fine, be all broody and don't talk to me" Shinji muttered. He squeezed his eyes shut and pressed his fingers on his temples, the thudding was back in his brain. It was almost like the healing effects of the 4th squad's pools didn't apply to the Real World.

The journey back took them about half an hour, Shinji was dragging his feet and suddenly Kensei seemed to be in no hurry after all. When they finally saw the old warehouse, their home, Kensei stopped. Shinji shuffled past him but stopped as Kensei called out his name.

"Yeah?" Shinji turned to look at Kensei over his shoulder, the man was staring right at him for the first time since they had come back.

"You know all this stuff better than I do" Kensei started, earning a quizzical look from Shinji, "what do you think is gonna happen?" Shinji frowned and snorted, but then quickly recovered seeing the look in Kensei's eyes.

"Hey, you're not seriously doubting this now, are you?" he asked, taking a step closer. Kensei look tormented, more so than before.

"Did Kisuke say something to you?" Shinji took a guess. The shopkeeper was probably the only man who could waver Kensei's faith like this. Kensei rubbed his neck, looking frustrated as if he hated himself for having doubts.

"He just told me to be cautious and not to get my hopes up, that's all" he replied, "and he's right, I was way too eager to get into this, it'll probably never happen. The Central 46 will never take us back, it's a fucking ridiculous idea in the first place…" Kensei didn't have time to finish his sentence as Shinji promptly smacked him across the face. The blonde was partly surprise Kensei didn't tear his arm off but merely stared back at him, not wide-eyed from surprise but looking like he thought he deserved it.

"Just shut the fuck up Kensei" Shinji hissed at him, "I don't know if you're fucking blind or what but you obviously didn't see the look on Shuuhei's face when you left, or you wouldn't dare say shit like that. Hell, even I felt sorry for him, so did Kisuke, that's saying something of the level of misery you cause him every fucking time you leave. And if few stupid words from Kisuke can make you forget that face, then you don't fucking deserve him, you get that? So you better stop playing around with him for good or man the fuck up and stop being such a pussy." Shinji stopped to breathe and part of him waited for Kensei to finally hit him back, his body ready to flee if Kensei decided to pound into him. But instead the man cracked him a crooked smile and rubbed his reddened cheek.

"You're getting weaker" he retorted to Shinji, who stared at him in disbelief.

"Wh- the fuck's wrong with you Kensei" the blonde snapped and then flinched as Kensei reached his hand towards him. But instead of hitting him, Shinji felt his shoulder being patted in an almost gentle way and then Kensei strutted past him. He turned around to stare at Kensei's receding back, his mouth opening and closing as he tried to think of words to say.

"He- hey! Wait!" Shinji finally shouted and ran after Kensei, "Were you fucking with me just now?"

"I don't know what you're talking about" Kensei said as they came to the doors of the warehouse. Kensei flicked his wrist to dispel the Kido barrier and opened the large doors. Shinji flailed his hands desperately to express his current state of mind but Kensei didn't pay him any attention.

"Son of a bitch" Shinji muttered under his breath as he stepped inside the warehouse and closed the door. Love and Rose were still lounging around, chattering to each other as Kensei walked past them towards the stairs.

"Hey, Kensei, Shinji, you're back" Love greeted them, "how was Kisuke?"

"Fine" Kensei replied as he hurried up the stairs into his room, leaving Shinji behind to answer to all the other questions.

"Oh, then what took you so long? You were gone for the whole day" Rose asked. Shinji was still staring after Kensei before he shook his head again and snapped the hat off his head.

"We had to test the gigais a little before he gave them to us, little sparring and stuff" the blonde lied through his teeth like a pro, "then he offered us some sake and we stayed the night. Nothing more mysterious than that."

"Oh, I would've thought you went to see Shuuhei and talk your way back into being captains" Rose remarked casually, his eyes fixed on Shinji to see the man's veneer drop. Shinji let out a light laugh and spun his hat on his finger.

"I have no idea how you came up with that" he chuckled as he walked past the men, trying to slow his steps to a normal pace, "now if you'll excuse me, I have a hangover I need to tend to." Shinji managed to keep up his nonchalance until he came to his own door and slipped inside, quickly pressing it shut behind him and murmuring a sealing Kido on the door the keep it shut and preventing any distractions. He leaned his back against the cold steel surface and turned to look at the wall on his left hand side, he could feel Kensei's reiatsu brimming quietly few rooms away. The man seemed calm enough but his behavior still irked Shinji.

_Maybe he just needed someone to validate this whole thing, maybe he appreciates my opinion more than Kisuke's. _Shinji smiled at the thought, unrealistic as it was. He could understand both Shuuhei's belief that they would be taken back without a hassle but also Kisuke's cautiousness about the whole thing, the man knew Soul Society and its quirks better than anyone of them and just wanted them to be careful. And Kensei's temper wasn't anything new, the man's swinging moods could easily hold a candle to Hiyori's bad days.

_Maybe he wanted an honest opinion from a friend, Kisuke's always cryptic and Shuuhei's still bit naïve, despite the shit the Central 46 put him through. _Shinji huffed as he pushed himself from the door and meandered to his couch, lopping down and putting his feet up. He groaned as he felt his brain thumping inside his skull again and decided to stop thinking, it seemed to only make the pain worse. Shinji ended up daydreaming about his old captain's office and a shiny new haori until he dozed off late in the afternoon.

Kensei was also lying down in his own room, biting his time by throwing a tennis ball to the ceiling. There was already a prominent dent in the steel surface above his bed, this was his method of stress relief, and it also helped him think straight. A faint smile crossed his face every now and then as he kept throwing the worn-out tennis ball and catching it without even really looking. He kept replaying Shinji's words in his head, he had been slightly surprised by the man's reaction. He hadn't seen Shinji so riled up in months, he had almost thought the man had finally grown up and matured enough to keep his temper in check. But the still burning sensation on his face was evidence against that.

Kensei chuckled lowly as the ball banged against the ceiling and then fell back into his waiting hand. His mind reeled back to the events of the morning, before and after they had been interrupted by Kisuke and Shinji. Kensei hadn't told Shuuhei about his nightly adventures, he figured the young man would find out for himself if need be, and he didn't want Shuuhei to get upset from Kisuke's warnings, more than he already was. Kensei knew Kisuke meant well and that being cautious was only good but still, that downtrodden look on Shuuhei's face after he had been so happy…Kensei's chest felt tight just thinking about it and he threw the ball to the ceiling so hard the loud bang echoed in the small room. Next thing he heard was Lisa banging on the wall that separated their rooms and telling him to quiet it down.

Kensei squeezed the ball in his fist and let his arm lop on the bed beside him, his other hand pressing against his chest. He had never thought loving someone would hurt this bad, and still feel so good at the same time. That the weeks of almost painful longing would be instantly gratified by mere hours of being with that one person who was able to make everything feel perfect. That one person could make him do things he would've never even think of doing, and here he was, returning to Soul Society and regaining his old seat as the captain of the ninth squad.

Kensei smiled grimly as he tossed the ball to the floor where it rolled into the corner, he was getting ahead of himself again. But still, being a captain would beat staying in this dump everyday, even if the Shinigami would despise him for what he was, an abomination. _And a war hero. But this is not for me, _Kensei thought as he exhaled slowly and closed his eyes, trying to return to this morning when he had woken up next to Shuuhei. _This is for him. It's all for him._

* * *

Back in Soul Society, Shuuhei was returning to his office. He felt bit woozy from all the drinking last night and was preparing to seal himself in his office and maybe take a long nap before even looking at any of his paperwork. He tried to look presentable and relatively sober as he walked through the office, greeting his subordinates with a slightly weary smile. As he finally slipped into his office and closed the door, he noticed a package left on his desk. Shuuhei looked at the mysterious packet with interest and realized that it was a bento box. He opened it gingerly and it revealed to contain a small mountain of sushi inside it. There was also a note, scribbled in an almost unreadable handwriting Shuuhei immediately recognized.

"_Greetings from a certain someone. I was told to watch over you so here, I'll come over to check if you ate it all. Renji." _Shuuhei smiled at the note and glanced at the bento box. He then read the note over again and frowned. _A certain someone, watch over me? _He knew who Renji meant but the question was when. Kazeshini saw this as an opportunity to pitch in with his input.

"_Probably after your sorry ass passed out, remember? I'm surprised he left that redhead in a shape where he could still write" _the spirit cackled maliciously. Shuuhei scoffed and folded the note, tugging inside his shirt.

"I told you, it's not a competition" he muttered as he picked out a piece of sushi and put it in his mouth. Shuuhei almost let out a moan as the rice melted on his tongue, he hadn't realized how hungry he was.

"_Not to you, but to them it is. Renji's just using this whatever 'guardian angel'-act now to get back into your pants and make you forget about our little freak back in the Real World. And I wouldn't blame him, I remember you two had loads of fun back in the day."_

"That's in the past, we were kids, now shut up and let me eat" Shuuhei ordered promptly as he sat down and put the bento box into his lap, "besides, Renji would never do that. He has other things occupying his mind." Kazeshini was quiet for a while, Shuuhei could sense the spirit being almost curious. It usually didn't pay much attention to Shuuhei's social life, unless it was something carnal if could feed off of, so it wasn't any wonder it wasn't aware of the little things that went on around Shuuhei.

"_Really? Someone particular caught our little redhead's eye? Should we be jealous?"_

"First of all, Renji's not ours, or mine, and no, we're not jealous. I just hope Renji knows what he's doing" Shuuhei replied as he munched on his sushi. Kazeshini seemed unsatisfied, it would've wanted more dirty details but sensed Shuuhei's adamancy on this point and just jeered at him and stayed quiet. Shuuhei enjoyed his late lunch in peace and felt much better, even so that he was able to get some work done before there was a knock on his door later in the evening.

"It's open" he shouted as he signed yet another report. The door creaked open and a familiar presence entered his office. Shuuhei didn't even need to look as Renji walked over to his desk and sat down opposite him, leaning his head onto his hands.

"Rough morning?" Shuuhei asked, trying not to sound too amused. His friend groaned and rubbed his face, his eyes were almost as red as his hair.

"You can say that again" Renji growled, "the captain always murders me when I come to work with a hangover. Just being in the same room with him kills me, his reiatsu is like stabbing needles into my brain." Renji managed to raise his eyes to Shuuhei who was hiding his face behind a report sheet. Renji reached his hand to pull the paper down and revealed Shuuhei's smiling face.

"I take it you got my packet?"

"Yes, and thank you for that, it was very kind of you" Shuuhei smiled at him, "I hope Kensei wasn't too rough on you." Renji swatted the air with his hand as he leaned back on his seat.

"Nah, I've had far worse. Working under captain has prepared me for hard questioning no matter how drunk I am." Shuuhei laughed and put down his papers, focusing solely on Renji for the moment.

"So, you two worked it all out?" he asked bit tentatively.

"Yeah yeah, he just asked me what the deal between us is, or was more like" Renji said, gesturing to Shuuhei and himself, "and I said we're just friends, that's all. But if he hurts you, his ass will be mine. That's about it."

"And he told you to look after me?" Shuuhei prompted, remembering the note.

"Well yeah, said you were getting thin. Maybe he's not really into that." Shuuhei snorted and shook his head, pressing his fingers against his temples.

"Renji, you're awful."

"I know" the redhead smirked and then groaned, holding his head again.

"He reminds me of you, you know" Shuuhei said after a small silence, looking at Renji from under his brow. The vice-captain looked back at him, clearly not knowing how to respond.

"Is that a good thing or…" he asked, his tattooed eyebrows dancing on his forehead.

"It's a good thing, trust me" Shuuhei assured him, "you're both good men, bit brash and immature but good."

"Aaand?" Renji smirked, looking mischievous this time.

"And what?" Renji wiggled his eyebrows at Shuuhei, who blushed and quickly smacked the redhead with a report file.

"Abarai Renji, stop being so goddamn filthy about everything!" Renji howled out of laughter as he tried to dodge Shuuhei's hits and finally fell to the floor. Shuuhei sighed as he lopped back into his chair, shaking his head again.

"You're just impossible sometimes." Renji decided to stay on the floor just in case and crossed his legs in front of him.

"Yeah I know" he said, scratching the back of his head, "but hey, soon you'll have two of us running around, making your life a misery, eh?" Shuuhei's smile faltered slightly.

"Yeah…" Renji frowned hearing the sudden mood change in Shuuhei's voice.

"Okay, what happened? Did he say something, do something, what?"

"No, it's not him, it's this whole thing…" Shuuhei sighed and closed his eyes, suddenly he felt very tired.

"Shuu, tell me so I can help. And I will, you know that."

"It's just something Urahara-san said, that we shouldn't get too ahead of ourselves with this whole thing, you know it might not work out. With the Central 46 and all, they don't really like the Visoreds, or me for that matter." Renji scoffed and threw his head back, his hand twirling his long ponytail around his fist.

"Bullshit and you know it. You got all the captains behind you, we're hugely understaffed, they're war heroes, I think they can make an exception in this case." Renji raised an eyebrow at Shuuhei who was still looking torn.

"I know the Central 46 is full of dicks, but you got the most powerful and smartest Shinigami backing you up, I don't think some old crones stand a chance against that."

"Yeah yeah, maybe you're right."

"I thought we established last night that I am always right, so no buts." Shuuhei tugged on his hair, grimacing at Renji.

"How can you be so sure?" Renji shrugged and leaned back on his arms.

"I just know you and you can be quite a pain if you really want something. Plus after last night's visit from your hubby I'm pretty convinced Kensei's the same." Finally Shuuhei managed a smile and sat up on his chair, leaning his elbows on his desk.

"Well we just have to wait and see now, won't we?" he sighed. Renji smirked back at him, leaning down so he was lying on the floor.

"Just remember, if you need anything, I'm here. Even if you don't want me to be." Shuuhei hemmed and tapped his fingers against his cheek.

"Despite everything, you're a good friend Renji."

"I know" the redhead chuckled, "and that's why I feel like shit today, so I hope you appreciate this."

"You know I do. Even without the free lunches."

"Good. Remember to tell your hubby that I brought that, I don't want his first action as a captain to be kicking my ass for negligence." Shuuhei laughed, Renji smiled back at him. He was already looking better than yesterday.

"So you think this will all come through?"

"Of course it will, if nothing else then I'll take personal responsibility for it. I can't afford buying you lunches forever." Usually Shuuhei would've responded with a snappy comment but this time he didn't want to make light of the situation. He was glad he had someone like Renji to keep him afloat.

"Thank you Renji" he said quietly, earning a curious look from the redhead. Renji's face melted into a soft smile Shuuhei had grown to know so well.

"Don't mention it. And save those looks for when Kensei when he comes back." Shuuhei lowered his face, he didn't want Renji to see how much his casual words actually meant to him right now. The redhead seemed to notice it though and stayed quiet. The silence stretched on, comfortably and softly as both men ignored the whole world around them and enjoyed being able to just be with someone without having to feel the need to fill the silence with inane rambling.

After a while Shuuhei glanced at Renji, noting that the man had closed his eyes and was dozing off on the floor. He didn't have the heart to wake him up but instead went back to his work, a faint smile stuck to his lips. _Maybe soon enough I won't have to do this alone anymore, _he thought as he signed yet another report, imagining Kensei's signature under it instead of his own. Shuuhei snorted at his own romantically idiotic thoughts but his smile only grew wider. For the first time in weeks his heart felt light.

* * *

"_Absence diminishes mediocre passions and increases great ones, as the wind extinguishes candles and fans fires."_

_-_Francois de La Rochefoucauld


End file.
